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Will Says...

Old Ladies Crazy About Old Cowboy Who Rides a Robotic Horse

But I have to tip my hat to the Crazy Cranford Cowboy, a crazy old coot who tools around town atop a robotic horse is a pimp in my book.

Robert Paul ReyesInsanity: Male Principal Loses Bet: Milks Cow Dressed As Lady Gaga! - It`s appropriate that it was a male principal who dressed as Lady Gaga given that the pop diva looks like a drag queen on crack.
Robert Paul ReyesDude Arrested For Calling Police Headquarters Pretending To Be Obama - Slater threw away his summons near a Dunkin' Donuts, and it should come as no surprise that it was found by a donut-loving cop.
Robert Paul ReyesDude Hits Bicyclist Upside The Head With Sausage, And Steals His Bike! - It's a nauseating experience to watch sausages being made, and it's humiliating to be hit upside the head with a sausage.
Robert Paul ReyesLady Moons Cop At A Police Station: Ain't No Shame In Her Game! - It's never the right time to moon a police officer at a police station, that's just begging for trouble
Robert Paul ReyesNattily Dressed Gentleman Robs Bank: Fashion Police Should Have Arrested Him - If I ever see this character, I hope I'm the one wearing sunglasses.
Robert Paul ReyesDude Named 'Rother' Calls 911: Deli Didn't Slather Enough Mayo On His Sandwich - I hope Rother spends at least a day in jail for abuse of the 911 system, the jailbirds would just love a dude named "Rother" who is so picky about his sandwiches.
Robert Paul ReyesCops Tase Nude Lady, 80, For Disturbing The Peace With Her Walking Cane - The cops deserve a raise and a commendation, for dealing with a difficult situation with tact and diplomacy.
Robert Paul ReyesMan Finds Spider In Bed, Runs Through Glass Door & Out Of House Naked As A Jaybird! - If I see a spider in my bed I might wet my drawers and shriek like a schoolgirl, but I will manage to maintain my composure.
Robert Paul ReyesSilly Speeding Blonde Thinks Cop Targeted Her Because She's A Blonde - The woman`s name wasn`t released by the cops, just as well we know everything that we should know about her: She`s a blond.
Robert Paul ReyesOutrage: Killjoy Cops Arrest Lovely Ladies Flashing On Golf Course - I hope a gentleman steps up to the plate and pays the bail for these exceptional women.
Robert Paul ReyesRat Crawls Up Lady's Leg Inside Her Pants In New York City Subway - But it`s not just rats that one must watch out for on the subway, it`s also muggers, flashers, drunks, thugs and homeless that stink to high heaven.
Robert Paul ReyesSwear In Public? Pay $20 Fine In Middleboro, Massachusetts - If a refined gentleman is walking down the street and he steps on dog poop it's perfectly understandable if he utters an epithet.
Robert Paul ReyesHotel In Sweden Offers Free Stay In Exchange For Art Created By Guest - The Clarion Hotel is a world-class hotel; I would be ashamed of submitting a work of art for a one-day stay at a Super Eight motel.
Robert Paul ReyesVideo: Shin-Kicking Championships Held In The UK - I love sports like football, baseball, hockey and basketball and even golf, but there are quite a few "sports" that seen to have been invented only to fill up programming on ESPN.
Robert Paul ReyesVideo: Insane Artist Turns Dead Cat Into Helicopter! Creepiest Thing Ever! - Jansen`s stunt is an insult to the memory of his cat and the Wright brothers.
Robert Paul ReyesGorgeous Lady Steals 7 Pregnancy Tests & Lubricant - If Joy doesn`t have a husband or a serious boyfriend, I`m available and I will keep her medicine cabinet stocked with pregnancy tests.
Robert Paul ReyesMan, 93, Competing in Senior Games As A Sprinter - I have nothing but admiration and respect for Bach.
Robert Paul ReyesCop Cites Good Samaritan For Littering: Drops Dollar Bill Attempting To Help Beggar - The Barney Fife who ticketed Davis should be reassigned to follow a cop on a horse, and clean up after the animal.
Robert Paul ReyesDude Rams His Truck Into Taco Bell: Upset Over Missing Taco! - I hope the woman who was in the truck with this character will kick him to the curb like a week-old taco.
Robert Paul ReyesDude Brandishes Gun To Cut In Line At McDonald's - The cons will have a lot of fun with this Hamburglar when he lands in the Big House.
Robert Paul ReyesHoly Cow! Cows Crash Party, Get Roaring Drunk! - If huge cows crash your party, you`d be well-advised to moooooove over!
Robert Paul ReyesDude Wearing Darth Vader Mask Robs Ohio Bank - May the farce be with you!
Robert Paul ReyesDrunk Driver Had Zebra Riding Shotgun - This dude is going straight from the Dog House to the Big House; I hope his girlfriend takes good care of the zebra while the jackass is in jail.
Robert Paul ReyesKindergartener Takes His Dad's Pot To School In His Backpack - However, if the kid`s backpack also contained four bags of Doritos, a couple of Twinkies, and a cupcake,I`d say the little freak was smoking the dope.
Robert Paul ReyesBeijing Officials: Only Two Flies Allowed Per Toilet - Only the poor souls who give Rosie O`Donnell a Brazilian wax or a pedicure have a worse job than a Chinese restroom attendant.
Robert Paul ReyesBanned License Plate In Maryland: Heroin - Don't be a idiot, if you can't live without a personalized license plate, at least choose an innocuous plate like: CatLover
Robert Paul ReyesAviation Company Fires Employees Who Complained About Lack Of Toilet - Did the owners of Menzies Aviation expect their employees to wear adult diapers?
Robert Paul ReyesSuspicious Package In Cemetery Turns Out To Be Teens' Art Project - When your art project is mistaken for a bomb, you need to attend remedial art class.
Robert Paul ReyesOutrage: Dude Uses Statue Of Buddha To Smash Windshield - I hope Galarza is reincarnated as a statue of Tinky Winky.
Robert Paul ReyesPink Duct Tape-Clad Lady Injures 3 Cops, Bartender & Female Customer At Bar - If you live in Seattle and you see a woman pull out a roll of pink duct tape from her purse, for God`s sake run for your life!
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