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Will Says...

Melania Trump Has the Gravitas of a Boa Feather

Melania Trump has been keeping a low profile lately, and so I searched her on Google News to find out what she's been up to lately.

Robert Paul ReyesDonald Trump's 'Breeding' Tweet Racist as Hell - President Donald Trumps tweets are a real-time glimpse into the sewer of racism that breeds in his mind.
Robert Paul ReyesHillary Clinton Went on an F-Bomb Tirade Against Donald Trump in Debate Prep - Hillary Clinton unleashed a f--k-laced fusillade about President Trump as they were preparing to debate in 2016, according to a new book.
Robert Paul ReyesShania Twain Says She Would Have Voted for Trump, Then Apologizes - Multi-platinum country-pop star Shania Twain is walking back a statement she made in an interview with The Guardian in which she said she would have voted for Donald Trump were she an eligible voter.
Robert Paul ReyesDonald Trump Considering Pardon for Boxer Jack Johnson - Is Donald Trump serious about granting a full pardon to this African American icon? Trump values celebrity above everything else, and if Stallone recommends pardon for Johnson, he may very well follow through.
Robert Paul ReyesDonald Trump and White Evangelicals: A Marriage Made in Hell - We will never forgive Trump for his racism and misogyny, and we will never forgive white evangelicals for supporting such a moral degenerate.
Robert Paul ReyesTed Cruz's Time Magazine Tribute to Donald Trump is an Embarrassment - When Ted Cruz was asked to write a public tribute in Time magazine to the lowlife orange bully who mercilessly attacked him and his family during the 2016 presidential campaign, he would have politely declined if he had a shred of dignity.
Robert Paul ReyesStray Cat Scares Bejesus Out of Wanker - A customer at a Tennessee garden center was caught on security camera jumping onto a store counter to avoid a stray cat that wandered in.
Robert Paul ReyesRep. Jim Jordan Tells Anderson Cooper He's Never Heard Trump Lie - House Freedom Caucus co-founder Rep. Jim Jordan repeatedly insisted in an interview with CNN's Anderson Cooper that he has never heard pathological liar President Donald Trump tell a fib.
Robert Paul ReyesLittle Girl Draws Crude Drawing of Her Beloved Kitty on Missing Pet Flyer - A young girl is doing everything she can to find her missing cat.
Robert Paul ReyesTwo Men Arrested for Being Black at Starbucks in Trump's America - I avoid Starbucks like the plague, I prefer not to patronize an establishment that's a magnet for slackers, wankers, hipsters and other assorted millennial riff-raff.
Robert Paul ReyesNew York Daily News Headline: PEE BRAIN! Trump is a Pea-Brain Golden Showers-Loving Freak - The White House needs a solid cleansing, the People's House needs to be hosed down, washing away pee-stained Trump and his all of his lackeys.
Robert Paul ReyesChristian Conspiracy Theorist David Meade Predicts Rapture Will Take Place April 23, 2018 - The Bible warns us in Matthew 24.36: But of that day and hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only.
Robert Paul ReyesCrazy Woman Offers to Trade Car for Entire Stock of Necco Wafers! - A Florida woman really loves Necco Wafers, the colorful candies made by a Massachusetts-based company that is currently at risk of shutting down.
Robert Paul ReyesOutrage: Alabama Football Team Prays for Donald Trump at White House! - Members of the University of Alabama football team prayed with President Donald Trump on Tuesday afternoon as they made their ceremonial visit to the White House as winners of the 2017-2018 College Football Playoff National Championship.
Robert Paul ReyesDiamond and Silk's Coonery and Buffoonery Resonates With Trump's Racist Base - It sickens me that two black women shucking and jiving in support of a blatantly racist president garner millions of views on YouTube.
Robert Paul ReyesDude Stabs Woman With Steak Knife Because He Didn't Like Texture of His Steak - I guarantee that the next time this woman fixes a steak dinner for her man, it will be cooked to his exact specifications. I can also guarantee that there will be a next time, stupid women rarely kick their violent boyfriends to the curb.
Robert Paul ReyesCollege Student Uses CPR She Learned From 'The Office' to Save Squirrel - Michigan University student, Natalie Belisto, isn't a useless wanker like her contemporaries, she used CPR to save the life of a drowning squirrel.
Robert Paul ReyesFormer Mexican President Vicente Fox is a Master at Trolling Donald Trump - Viva Fox! You made my day, please continue to troll Trump, we hate him even more you hate the bastard.
Robert Paul ReyesIs Melania Trump Mocked More Than Any Other First Lady? - In their alternate reality conservatives claim that no First Lady has been demeaned and mocked more than Melania. Bitch, please!
Robert Paul ReyesTrump's Twitter Typos - But then again even if Trumps tweets were free of typos and punctuation errors, they are still the ramblings of a sick and twisted mind.
Robert Paul ReyesBizarre UK Police Sketch Breaks the Internet - A British police department's computer-generated sketch of a suspect is going viral thanks to the face's unrealistic proportions.
Robert Paul ReyesTrump Tweets Thanks to Rasmussen Reports Poll - President Trump took to Twitter on Tuesday and commented on a poll from conservative-leaning Rasmussen Reports that shows his approval rating at 50 percent, ahead of where former President Barack Obama was at the same point in his presidency.
Robert Paul ReyesRobert Paul Reyes: My DNA Results - Culturally and racially I identified as Hispanic, regardless how much the blood of my European conquerors may be in my DNA.
Robert Paul ReyesDonald Trump, Melania Trump and the Easter Bunny - How long will we allow Donald Trump's circus to continue?
Robert Paul ReyesHappy Easter and Long Live the Memory of Roswell - No scientist has proven or disproven the existence of God, and no astronomer or cosmologist has proven or disproven the existence of extraterrestrial intelligent life.
Robert Paul ReyesDonald Trump Declares April National Sexual Assault Awareness Month - President Donald Trump issued a proclamation Friday designating April as National Sexual Assault Awareness month.
Robert Paul ReyesWhite Evangelicals Have Made Porn Kosher - Conan O'Brien poked fun at President Donald Trump's evangelical supporters over claims they are helping to bring porn into the mainstream on Tuesday.
Robert Paul ReyesWould You Buy a Naked Donald Trump Statue for $20,000? - A statue of a naked Donald Trump is going on the auction block.
Robert Paul ReyesWanker Found Guilty of Hate Crime After Making Video of Dog Giving Nazi Salute - A man who filmed a pet dog giving Nazi salutes before putting the footage on YouTube has been convicted of committing a hate crime.
Robert Paul ReyesLet's Pray There Isn't a Sex Tape of Stormy Daniels and Donald Trump - Imagine the consequences of a sex tape of Stormy and Trump being leaked online: Millions would retch is disgust, and a portal into hell would be ripped open.
Subcsribe to theSOP's Opinion feed.
Subcsribe to theSOP's Opinion audio podcast.
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