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Contributor

Robert Paul Reyes

UFO Hunter Discovers 'Fossilized Iguana' on Mars: Video! - There are no iguanas on the red planet, no UFO`s flying over our little blue planet, but there are plenty of fools who need to get a life.

Power Bacon Deodorant: The Ladies Will Be All Over You Like Stink On Pigs: Video - Power Bacon sells for $9.99 per stick, and comes with a tongue-in-cheek warning that it is not to be consumed.

Lady Wears Cheeseburger As Sandal After Having Sex In Waffle House Parking Lot - When you get busted for having sex in a Waffle House parking lot, and for an encore you wear a cheeseburger as a sandal: You're a redneck.

Dude Argues Denial of 'COPSLIE' Plate Violates his Free Speech: Video - "COPSEATDONUTS" and "COPSRACIALLY PROFILE" also neatly sum up police behavior, but they are too long for a license plate.

Outrage: Tanning Salon's Thanksgiving Ad Insults Native Americans - As Thanksgiving approaches I am thankful that we have made long strides in eradicating racism, but the vestiges of this ugly disease still remain.

Outrage: Home Depot Tweets Blatantly Racist Pic: Video - Until Home Depot makes proper amends for its horrific mistake; I will go to Lowe`s to buy materials for my home improvement projects.

Brad Paisley & Carrie Underwood Diss Obamacare: Video - Obama should be impeached for lying about Obamacare!

Outrage: Drowsy Driver Crashes Into Mattress Store - The sleepy lady should have called a taxi, or a friend or family member to drive her home.

Outrage: Tomahawk-Throwing Champion Fails To Throw Tomahawk At Burglar: Video - Jesus and the residents of Hemet are weeping over the failure of this woman to rid their community of this burglar.

Old Dude Loses Diamond Ring In Trick-or-Treater's Bag - A Florida man is asking his neighbors to search through their children`s candy after his diamond ring apparently fell into a trick-or-treater`s bag.

Outrage: Atlanta Falcons Mascot Jokes About Suicide: Video - Foolish bird should stop tweeting!

Neanderthal Complains About Rainbow Dinosaur In Front Of High School: Video - All`s well that ends well: The beautiful rainbow dinosaur will be allowed to stay in front of Granby high school.

Hottie Named Daisy Cowit Plows Car Into Herd Of Cows While Texting - You can now add Daisy Cowit to the list of soulless gingers who are wreaking havoc worldwide: Lindsay Lohan, Carrot Top, Shirley Manson, Danny Bonaduce & Seth Green.

'Bigfoot Hunt' Ends Up With Joker Getting Shot - Moral of this tale: Whenever you mention Bigfoot, you`re just putting your big foot in your mouth.

Ghost Doctors Search For UFO's In Central Park: Video - Central Park is for lovers, joggers and tourists -- give these UFO freaks a wide berth if you run into them in this beautiful oasis in the Big Apple.

Woman Runs Over Boyfriend For Refusing To Stop At McDonald's: Video - Moral of story: If your girlfriend loves a Big Mac more than she loves you, time to kick her to the curb.

Video of UFO In Kentucky! Call MUFON! Contact the Air Force! - UFO`s are real! Redneckognize!

God Have Mercy! Mom Has 14-Pound Baby! Video! - Mom and dad would be well-advised to don an oxygen mask when they change his diapers.

Twenty Pound Carp Running For City Council In Ann Arbor - Politics is a dirty business inhabited by snakes and rats; a carp wading into this dirty cesspool is a breath of fresh air.

Outrage: Mick Jagger Hit On Katy Perry When She Was Only 18! - Come on Jagger, hit on somebody your own age. How about Phyllis Diller? Wait, she`s dead? So what, you`d still make a good couple.

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