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Contributor

Robert Paul Reyes

Public Terrified By Pictures Of Zombies On British Buses: Video - Get a life people; there are much scarier things than a picture of a zombie on a bus.

Dude, 64, Dressed As The Joker Arrested For Drunk Driving: Video - Jingle bells, Batman smells, Robin touched his junk, The batmobile lost its wheel, And the Joker got drunk.

Man, 68, Shoots Dude, 22, Sleeping With His Wife! - Grandpa`s Johnson may be shooting blanks, but there was nothing wrong with his shotgun.

Kim Kardashian & Kanye West Engaged! Video! - A reality show bimbo who loves only herself is going to marry a gay rapper who loves only himself.

Moron Calls Cops To Report Stolen Jell-O From Employee Break Room - I`d be surprised if a cop was dispatched to investigate this theft, he would be a sour mood if he had to put down his donut and coffee to look into this ridiculous matter.

Woman Gives Birth In A Barnes & Noble Bookstore - The mother should name her baby Noble, Barney, or Bookworm in honor of the place where he was born.

Oprah Winfrey Refuses To Shill For Obamacare - Who is more loathsome: Oprah, Obama or Obamacare?

UFO Baby Stolen From Exhibit In Roswell, Quickly Replaced! Video! - Roswell New Mexico, has only one claim to fame: The infamous UFO incident that took place in 1947, when a flying saucer crashed on a ranch.

Peru's Air Force Reopens UFO Investigation Team: Video - Why does Peru even have an air force? It`s not like it`s facing invasion from Ecuador, Columbia or Brazil.

UFO Falls From Sky Over Iceland: Video - I think the light falling from the sky is an emergency flare activated by an Icelandic resident desperate to be rescued from his godforsaken country.

Clown Kills Leader Of Drug Cartel - Let`s look at the bright side, maybe Felix died laughing.

Want To Know If Anybody Has Died In Your House? Click DiedInHouse.Com - Think you house is haunted by somebody who died there? Who you gonna call, Ghostbusters?

Clueless Cops Mistook Jolly Rancher Candy For Meth: Video - Not even in his worst nightmare would Olatunjiojo have imagined that an innocent trip to a candy store would have resulted in his arrest and strip search. Were the police hoping to find contraband Twizzlers in his rectum?

Public Employees Reprimanded For Trying To Photograph Ghosts - These ghost hunters must have Top Ramen noodles for brains, a motion-sensitive camera isn`t going to capture incorporeal beings.

Dude Solves Rubik's Cube During Free Fall In Wind Tunnel: Video - A British skydiver took 3 minutes, 16 seconds to become the first person to solve a Rubik's Cube puzzle in a freefall-simulating wind tunnel.

NASCAR Race & Bacon and Beer Milkshake: Redneck Heaven! Video - I`m not a NASCAR fan, but I plan on making a pilgrimage to the Texas Motor Speedway, hit on a Daisy Dukes- clad country floozy, get drunk on Shake 'N Bacon Brews, and pretend I`m interested in the race.

Japanese Company Sells Wine For Cats: Video - The company also produces Wan Wan Beer for dogs. How appropriate, dogs strike me as beer drinkers and finicky cats as wine imbibers.

House Stenographer, Diane Reid: Patriot of the Year! Video of Outburst! - Our long national nightmare is over, at least for a few months, Congress finally passed legislation ending the government shutdown and raising the debt ceiling.

Kim Kardashian's Disgusting Butt Selfie: God Have Mercy On Us! - Kardashian specializes in a sub-genre of selfies: The butt selfie. As soon as she popped out her baby, she was back to doing what she loves the most: Taking selfies of her freakishly large ass.

Nude Dude Arrested For Jumping On Cars - Dude, in jail the jailbirds are going to be jumping on you!

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