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Contributor

Robert Paul Reyes

Nicki Minaj Blames Other Judges For Dismal 'American Idol' Ratings: Video - Where have you gone Simon Cowell, a desperate nation turns its eyes to you.

Octomom Breaks Lease, Leaves Behind Rental Reeking Of Urine - The Manson Family, The Jersey Shore reality stars, Honey Boo Boo and her clan and a gang of cannibals would have left the rental in better shape.

Saudi Arabia Deports Men: They Were Too Handsome And Irresistible To Women - My guess is that the religious police officers arrested the fetching men, because they were afraid they might fall victim to their seductive charms.

Ozzy & Sharon Osbourne Divorcing? Say It Ain't So! Video - Sharon and Ozzy have been through a lot together, and I pray that they stay together until Ozzy`s heart or liver finally gives out.

Fire Engine Crew Stops To Help Injured Pooch - Kudos to the fire fighters, and the vets at the Rim Forest Animal Hospital who performed surgery on Sadie.

Kmart's Cool 'Ship My Pants' Commercial: Vulgar or Clever? - I almost shi* my pants watching this commercial.

Frank Bank: Lumpy Rutherford Of 'Leave it to Beaver' Dies: Video - Clarence "Lumpy" Rutherford: Wally`s fat friend who loved giving Beaver "The business."

Beaver Kills Man Trying To Take His Photo: Video - This isn`t the first time, nor will it be the last time, a dude got into trouble trying to take a photo of a beaver.

Pippi Longstocking (Tami Erin) Beats Male Roommate Over Pizza: Video - Pippi Longstocking, you pigtailed, freckled monster!

Banish Justin Bieber From Civilization For His Anne Frank Comment: Video - For Justin Bieber to leave such a self-serving message in the guestbook at the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam is such a horrendous error in judgment, that it will take him a lifetime to live it down.

Cop Tickets Dude Jogging Backward On Street: Video - If Mesa pulled this stunt in New York City, he would be a speed bump before anyone could shout "moron."

'Accidental Racist' By LL Cool J & Brad Paisley Worst Song Ever! Video - No sh** the song wasn`t perfect; it`s only the worst song in the history of Western Civilization.

Pop Tart Lindsay Lohan Demands Adderall In Rehab: Video - Lindsay Lohan is unclear on the concept of going to rehab, the medical professionals attempt to wean drug addicts off street drugs and harmful prescription drugs.

Lindsay Lohan Plans To Attend Drug Paradise Coachella Before Rehab: Video - Lilo attending Coachella makes as much sense as a kleptomaniac, say Lindsay Lohan, visiting a jewelry store.

Gwyneth Paltrow: Using Botox Made Me Look Crazy Like Joan Rivers: Video - Gwyneth Paltrow is the hottest 40-something actress in Hollywood, she doesn`t need Botox or plastic surgery.

Obese Woman Uses Cans of Spaghetti Sauce, Not Bomb, To Rob Bank - This humongous criminal has a rap sheet longer than she is wide, in other words she`s just an average citizen of Detroit.

Woman Attacks Boyfriend Because He Wouldn't Stop Singing 'Thrift Shop': Video - I`m gonna pop some tags...

Kelly Ripa Hasn't Seen Regis Philbin Since He Left Show: Video - A decade co-hosting a talk show with Pilbin is comparable to a decade doing hard time in a prison in Turkey.

Reebok Dumps Rick Ross As Spokesperson Over Date Rape Song: Video - The media are afraid to criticize rappers for their rampant and blatant misogyny, homophobia, and glorification of violence and materialism, lest they be labeled "racists."

Intoxicated Dude Met Probation Officer Holding 2 40-Ounce Bottles Of Beer And A Duck - The man was arrested, and we can only speculate if he ended up in prison, rehab or a mental asylum.

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