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Will Says...


Robert Paul Reyes

Should Pop Tart Lady Gaga Or Pop Icon Madonna Play Super Bowl Halftime Show? - I can only imagine the havoc Lady Gaga would wreak at the Super Bowl, she would make Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunction look like an innocent 3rd grade show and tell presentation.

Video: US Dismantles Colossal Super Duper B-53 Nuclear Bomb - I'm not sleeping any easier because this cold war relic has been destroyed, the US and Russia have a gazillion nuclear bombs and we can destroy our little blue planet a hundred times over.

Dude Firebombs Taco Bell: Outraged Chalupa Didn't Have Enough Meat - Taco Bell has been accused of allegedly fixing tacos that contained only 30 percent real meat, even if his chalupas weighed a pound each he'd be lucky if they contained an ounce of real meat.

Chaz Bono Eliminated From DWTS! Chaz Complains About Fat Jokes! - Chaz Bono is the most ungrateful Ewok in the world, the penguin should have been grateful that he was selected as a contestant on "Dancing with the Stars" even though he's not a star and he can't dance.

Coroner: Pop Tart Amy Winehouse Died Of Alcohol Poisoning - Amy Winehouse wasn't the first nor will she be the last to succumb to drugs and alcohol, but there is hope for drug addicts and alcoholics.

Video: Herman Cain's Web Ad Featuring Mark Block Is Disturbing, Creepy & Evil! - Former CEO of Godfather's Pizza, Herman Cain, is leading in most of the national polls, he doesn't have to resort to cheap gimmicks to bring attention to his campaign.

Top Ten Ways To Look Like Lady Gaga For Halloween - Ask a friend to hit you over the head with a sledgehammer, that's the best way to capture Lady Gaga's "dazed and confused" look.

Pop Tart Lindsay Lohan To Pose For Playboy For Cool Million? - I won't be buying the issue of Playboy featuring Lohan, if the pop tart's teeth are rotting, God only knows what the rest of her body parts look like.

Video: Northern Lights (Aurora) Greatest Show In The Universe - I'm glad that I was able to pull myself from the foolishness on the boob tube, and witness the majesty of the Northern Lights.

Outrage: Iranian Actress Marzieh Vafamehr To Be Lashed 90 Times With Whip - If John Travolta was sentenced to 90 lashes for his rotten acting in "Battleship Earth", nobody Democrat or Republican, Muslim or infidel dog would complain.

Pop Tart Lindsay Lohan Gets Her Disgusting Yellow Teeth Whitened - There are only two plausible explanations, the pop diva either munches on sweets all day long and doesn't brush her teeth or she's a meth head.

Herman Cain And Sarah Palin: Making A Mockery Of The Democratic Process - If we want to rid the democratic process of interlopers like Herman Cain and Sarah Palin, the press must stop shoving microphones in their faces and the public must ignore them.

Bentley Outraged Paris Hilton Drives A Pink Bentley Continental GT - CEO's, politicians, and other successful individuals own Bentleys, but Paris Hilton is probably the only one who drives a pink version.

Doomsday Preacher Harold Camping Wrong Again! No Rapture! - Harold Camping has a penchant for predicting the end of the world when he's running short of funds, the kooky preacher has predicted doomsday as many as 12 times.

Video: Huge Hole Near North Lawn Of White House! What The Heck Is Going On? - Is it a tunnel to Kenya that will allow Obama to secretly visit his place of birth?

Harrisburg Cancels Christmas Parade! Other Cities Should Do The Same! - Will somebody please organize a parade celebrating the spirit of Scrooge?

Pop Tart Lindsay Lohan Mopping Floors, Cleaning Toilets At The Morgue - The starlet's stint in the morgue may serve to humiliate her, but it won't motivate her to turn her life around. Lohan has too many sycophants and enablers surrounding her -- not to mention her toxic mother.

Why Are Liberals Afraid To Question Herman Cain's Intellect? - In the past I have implied that Cain isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer, let me now explicitly declare that Herman Cain is a moron.

'Spider-Man' Tries To Hold Up Convenience Store! Clerks Beat Him Silly! - Donning the Spider-Man mask probably made Foughty feel a little bit heroic, but he sure didn't feel like a super hero after the two clerks were done teaching him a lesson.

John Travolta Humiliated: He's Denied Reservations At Kentucky Fried Chicken - Imagine Travolta's shock and humiliation when he learned that he was denied reservations at KFC. Travolta hasn't been this crushed since he read the reviews for his godawful movie Battlefield Earth.


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