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Will Says...


Robert Paul Reyes

For God So Loved Tim Tebow He Gave Him 316 Yards Passing Victory Over Steelers - If the Broncos win the Super Bowl, I will be convinced that the Lord's favorite color is orange, and I will change my name to John 3:16.

Pop Tart Snooki Gets A Tattoo - Snooki pulled down her tiny top while the tattoo artist was working on her shoulder. Sly Snooki didn't want to disappoint her fans or the photographers in the house.

Snoop Dogg: I Want To Get High With Obama & Convince Him To Legalize Pot - You don't have to be insane in the membrane to discern that Snoop Dogg is a righteous brother, and if Obama had a lick of sense he would follow Snoop's advice.

Katy Perry Furious At Her Minister Parents - Katy Perry, your fans wish you nothing but the best.

Is Lindsay Lohan The Biggest Bimbo In Hollywood? - A few days ago she tattooed the words "live without regrets" on her left wrist. If anybody should have regrets its Lohan, drugs and alcohol have destroyed her personal life and her career.

New York Pastor Moonlights As An Armed Robber - I wouldn't trust this miscreant to mow my lawn, but some imbeciles are trusting him with their eternal salvation.

Outrage: Family Dollar Manager Steals Customer's iPad - The victim must be very happy to get her iPad back, I'm sure she is using it to send instant messages to all her friends warning them not to shop at the Family Dollar store.

Heroic Rescue Of Cat Atop 50-Foot Tree! Cat Coaxed With Can Of Fancy Feast - Cats are very finicky, it's a good thing the rescuer used a can of Fancy Feast, and not a generic brand, to coax the kitty cat.

Rick Santorum, Newt Gingrich, Ron Paul, Rick Perry: Who Hates Blacks The Most? - It's very telling that the only time the Republican presidential candidates mention the African American community, is when they stigmatize them as leeches who live off the welfare state.

Drunk Woman Damages $30 Million Painting By Rubbing Bare Buttocks On It - It`s an outrage that this iconic painting wasn`t protected by bullet-proof glass, and it`s a shame that there wasn`t a guard armed with a taser to stop her in her tracks before she could damage the painting.

British Couple Delighted: Cat Is Found After Four Years - I bet Willow is rolling her eyes, as her owners hug her to death.

Ricky Martin Tops The Advocate's List Of Top Ten Most Googled Gays - Should the Advocate have outed stars such as Oprah Winfrey or CNN's Anderson Cooper by including them on this list?

Judge Finds Hapless Felon Not Guilty Of Shooting Himself Twice In His Manhood - I'm not disappointed by the judge's ruling, this dude has suffered enough already.. Lockett doesn't have much of a brain, and he's blown away his genitals to Kingdom Come.

Video: (Alleged) Murderer Casey Anthony Releases Video On YouTube - Casey doesn't mention her murdered daughter, but she does go on and on about how much she loves the pooch she just adopted.

Publicity-Loving Herman Cain To Launch Bus Tour To Promote 9-9-9 Plan - Herman Cain is an ugly senior citizen who has been exposed as an adulterer and an ignoramus, the media will ignore him.

Japanese Twits Shut Down Twitter By Setting Record For Most Tweets Per Second - The Japanese twits sent a record 16, 197 tweets per second after midnight on New Year's Day.

Homeless Woman, AnnMarie Walsh, Used Twitter To Find Housing - Show support for AnnMarie and her cause by following her on Twitter @padschicago.

Let Israel Deal With Iran! Obama Should Let Israel Be Israel! - The Iranian ayatollahs don't fear a Muslim-pandering commander-in-chief, but they do fear Israel.

Dead Birds In Arkansas, Dead Fish In Norway: Are Mayan Prophecies True? - The stench of thousands of dead fish must be dreadful, but not as dreadful as the stench of millions of dead human beings. Let's hope that the Maya prophecies turn out to be another Y2K hype.

Herman Cain, Please Do The Right Thing And Disappear! - The only TV option that should be open to the randy minister is a reality show based on how he juggles his lovers.


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