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Robert Paul Reyes

Silly Swedes Sell Scrumptious Sausages Under Name "Obama" - What food item would you name after Obama? "Twinkies" should be renamed "Obamies", the Leader of the Free World is a wimp without a backbone.

Headless Body Found In Vero Beach - The cops say they will treat this case as a homicide until they can rule out otherwise.

Pop Tart Paris Hilton: God Makes Celebs - The Almighty is blamed for everything from earthquakes to hurricanes, it's unfair to blame Him for making celebs.

Lady Arrested For Squeezing Husband's Privates in Vero Beach FL. - If a woman squeezed my privates demanding to know where I had hidden her expensive ring, I would sing like a soprano and tell her exactly where I hid it.

Grandmas Shed Clothes To Pose For Calendar Fundraiser! - The Lake Helen women featured in the calendar, ages 44-87 don't exactly bare it all.

Breaking News: Blago (Rod R. Blagojevich) Sentenced To 14 Years In Prison - Blago has been sentenced to 14 years in prison. The former governor of Illinois, apologized to residents of his state, to the judge in his case

Cops Bust Gang of Kids Who Targeted Bass-Shaped Mailboxes - I just did a Google image search of "bass mailbox", and there are over 380,000 results! What kind of a screwed-up world do we live in?

SnoBars: Alcoholic Popsicles the Devil's Treat? - I hope any fool who eats a SnoBar will get brain freeze.

Herman Cain: The Rise And Fall Of An Arrogant Scam Artist - We get the leaders that we deserve, and a nation in intellectual and moral decline deserves to have Gingrich in the White House.

Woman Sues Dealership: Vehicle Smells Like A Dead Body - Margarita has a legitimate claim, and I hope she wins enough money to buy a luxurious new car with that wonderful new-car fragrance.

Video: Adorable Kittens Watching Figure Skating On TV - This video confirms my suspicions that most people who watch figure skating are real p{u}ssy... cats. A real man would rather undergo root canal surgery than watch figure skating on TV.

World's Largest Christmas Straw Goat Set On Fire! Is Arsonist Hero Or Goat? - Hello! Time to get a clue! The straw goat has been set on fire 28 times, maybe it's time to make the goat out of wood or Styrofoam, anything but straw!

Cop Had Sex In Patrol Car With Hookers! He Paid Them In Cash And Cocaine! - This sorry excuse for a police officer will receive a pension of $27,142 each year for the rest of his miserable life, starting when he turns 46 in four years.

2012: Huge Year For Madonna? - Madonna fans don't care if the world ends on 2012 as prophesied by the Mayan calendar, they will be too busy rocking to new hits from their idol.

Pop Icon Madonna To Play Super Bowl Halftime Show - Super Bowl, cheerleaders, Madonna and beer! Do we live in the greatest country in the world, or what?

Most Unusual Rescues By Firefighters - Firefighters deserve every dime they get for having to put up with these morons.

Outrage: TSA Goons Detain Pregnant Teen Over Purse With Design Of Gun - I've been told that the FBI won't hire any applicants with an IQ below 120, what's the minimum requirement for a TSA Agent, room temperature?

Top Ten Reasons Why Vanessa Griffin Long Is Divorcing Bishop Eddie Long - *The bishop's obsession with Justin Bieber! When the bishop bought a Justin Bieber wig, that was the last straw!

Gentleman Orders Hooker, Daughter Shows Up! Dude Keels Over In Shock! - Titus went back to his wife and family, and his daughter has stopped turning tricks. Or maybe she is plying her trade out of town, so she won't run into her dear old dad again.

Dude Wearing A Santa's Cap Arrested For Throwing Rock At Bus - When you don Santa's hat you have a responsibility to spread good tidings and good cheer. Instead of wishing his fellow passengers "Merry Christmas" or singing "White Christmas", this Scrooge was singing a song with profane lyrics.


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