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Contributor

Robert Paul Reyes

John McCain Doesn't Have A Snowball's Chance - When there is mock-serious debate as to whether your opponent is the Messiah, you don`t have a snowball`s chance of winning the general election. That`s the untenable situation that John McCain finds himself in.

Hulk Hogan Is One Freaky Dude - Hogan has a penchant for donning tights, bleaching his hair and he allows cameras to capture the craziness in his household for fame and money. But

Top Ten Hottest Female News Anchors - I don`t choose which news program to watch based on the attractiveness of the news anchor. But it`s fun to contemplate who are the most attractive female

Ten Best Ways Of Eating Watermelon - The Fourth of July is right around the corner, time for parades, picnics, fireworks and delicious watermelon.

A Crocodile Walks Into A Bar...Sounds like joke...It's NOT - A crocodile walks into a bar... Sounds like joke, but the punch line is that it really happened:

Young Sisters March To Protest High Cost Of Gas - Sadie and Pyper Vance marched through downtown Salt Lake City chanting and carrying signs protesting the high cost of gasoline. These young ladies are mad as hell, and they aren`t going to take it anymore.

Supreme Court Rules In Favor Of Second Amendment - These are the credentials that I`m a card-carrying liberal: I`m pro gay-rights, pro women`s right to choose, anti Iraq war, for the impeachment of Dick Cheney and George Bush, believer in global warming, pro affirmative

God Goes to Jail For Selling Cocaine - The Almighty has got away with genocide because he`s invisible and omniscient.

Groovy Idea: Pot Smoking Lounges At Denver International Airport - Travel by air becomes more stressful every day; we are practically stripped searched before we can board our plane and airliners are adding new

Sen. Barack Obama May Very Well Be The Messiah - Sen. Barack Obama, the presumptive Democratic presidential nominee, is the kind of transformational statesman that we witness only once in a generation.

New Vinyl Shower Curtains Release Harmful Chemicals - More than 100 toxic chemicals associated with health damage are released into the air from PVC vinyl shower curtains.

The Enemy of the Environment is President George W. Bush - Bush is Public Enemy Number One when it comes to protecting the environment, he takes a perverse delight in opposing green-friendly legislation.

Shock Jock Don Imus Utters Another Racist Remark - The only surprise is that it took months for Imus to utter a racist remark, he must be mellowing in his old age.

Congress: Graveyard for Global Warming and Energy Bills - A Hooter's waitress has a better chance of working her shift without receiving unwelcome sexual advances, than a climate bill has of clearing Congress.

Can We Blame The Earthquake In China On Bad Karma Or HAARP? - HAARP is a scientific research program-- not a diabolical plan to trigger earthquakes all over the world.

Tribute To Tim Russert - That chair, that decided the fortunes of so many candidates and politicians, now sits empty. In a symbolic gesture, Russert`s chair should be immediately carted away to the Smithsonian Institute, nobody will ever be able to replace him.

Ohio Teacher Axed for Branding Students with image of Cross - "The school board of a small central Ohio community voted unanimously Friday to fire a teacher accused of preaching his Christian beliefs despite staff complaints and using a device to burn the image of a cross on students` arms."

Comedy Giant George Carlin Dead At 71 - His comedy transcended generations and politics-- teens as well as grannies laughed at his irreverent humor.

Old Lady Hurt Trying On Victoria's Secret Thong - Macrida Patterson, a traffic officer for the Los Angeles Department of Transportation, claims her cornea was severely damaged in the underwear mishap."

Ellen DeGeneres And Portia De Rossi To Get Married - Ellen DeGeneres gave Portia de Rossi a glittering ring with pink diamonds for their upcoming wedding that will air in part on DeGeneres`s talk show.

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