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Contributor

Robert Paul Reyes

Selfie Featuring William Shatner & Cast of Star Trek: The Next Generation! The End is Near! - But a selfie featuring the cast of Star Trek: The Next Generation and the original Trek captain and Priceline.Com pitchman William Shatner may destroy not only the Earth but the entire universe.

Viral Video! Dog Pets Owner! - Trust me your cat or your dog will never pet you, so enjoy the vicarious thrill of watching Rilo pet his lucky owner.

Viral Video! Meet Winter the Bouncy Baby Lamb! - Meet Winter the baby lamb, when his owner calls him he bounces over to her with pure unadulterated joy, passion, and energy.

Breaking News: Hello Kitty Isn't a Cat! She's a Cartoon Girl! Video! - In a Los Angeles Times exclusive, Sanrio the maker of Hello Kitty, told an anthropologist from the University of Hawaii that Hello Kitty is not a cat, she`s not even Japanese. She`s a girl cartoon character.

Viral Video! Grandpa Gets His Groove On! Dancing Machine! - Grandpa was shuffling and swaying to the beat, dancing like a mofo.

Viral Video! Epic Meltdown by Minor Leauge Baseball Manager - There`s no crying in baseball, as any fan knows. But childish tantrums by umpires are par for the course.

OMG! Dude's Testicals Bigger Than Basketballs! Weigh 100 Pounds! Video! - Be careful what you wish for, if your testicles are as small as peas; don`t pray for bigger balls, you might be stricken with scrotal lymphedema.

Basement Jaxx Claims UFO Sighting on New Album Junto: Video - I don`t care if Felix Burton was abducted by aliens, and suffered an anal probe and a root canal, his music sucks, especially his song about UFO`s.

Homer Simpson Completes ALS Ice Bucket Challenge! Video! Get With the Program! - By now everybody and their obese mother has done the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge, even morons who don`t know ALS from an STD have posted their ice bucket challenge videos on YouTube or Facebook.

British Bloke Fakes Kidnapping to Enjoy Night Out Without Girlfriend! - A man in England was fined for wasting police time after telling his girlfriend he was kidnapped so he could stay at a party with his friends.

Media Goes Bonkers Over Killing Of Michael Brown, Ignores Similar Killing of White Man by Black Cop! - The media needs to end the double standard, and stop inciting racial hatred.

Rare Blue Lobster Caught Off Maine Coast: Video - A blue lobster was caught off the coast of Maine over the weekend a 1-in-2 million find.

Watch as Koala is Revived with Mouth-to-Mouth CPR - A koala that got hit by a car is alive and recovering after rescuers in Melbourne administered CPR to save the small mammal.

Bomb Expert Called in to Defuse Plastic Toy Lightsaber - A plastic toy lightsaber discarded on a road in Alaska caused a bomb scare, prompting local police to dispatch a bomb expert.

Michael Brown: Thug or Gentle Giant? - The racial divide in America will never disappear until the African American community stops making excuses for the propensity of their youth to resort to violence.

Viral Video: Whale Ticked Off at Annoying Brats - How I wish those stupid kids would be eaten by lions at the zoo, and the whale would be released into the ocean.

Breaking News: 6.0 Earthquake Jolts San Francisco Bay Area - A long, rolling temblor pegged at 6.0 by the U.S. Geological Survey shook a wide swath of the Bay Area awake early Sunday, causing damage to buildings and sending at least 70 people to a hospital with non-life threatening injuries.

Giant Tibetan Mastiff Tolerates Little Girl! Adorable Video! - Violence raging in the Middle East, turmoil in Ukraine, riots and civil unrest in Ferguson ... Has the news got you down? Here`s a delightful one minute video that`s guaranteed to thaw your heart, and make you smile.

Outrage: Miss Colombia Hopeful Disqualified for Showing Underboob - This is an outrage of Biblical proportions that threatens to destroy not only the credibility and legitimacy of the Miss Columbia organization, but that of the country as well.

Stolen Statue of Obama Discovered with Six-Pack of Twisted Tea in Park: Video - I`m surprised the Obama statue wasn`t discovered on a bench in a golf course with an empty 40 oz. bottle of malt liquor and a joint hanging from its mouth.

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