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Contributor

Robert Paul Reyes

CBN: 'There's a Spiritual Awakening Underway in the White House'! Bullcrap! - Some of the most powerful people in America have been gathering weekly to learn more about God's Word, and this Trump Cabinet Bible study is making history.

Donald Trump and Anthony Scaramucci: Vulgar Twins From the Pit of Hell - We must rid ourselves of Donald Trump and his posse of fools, sycophants and scumbags by any means necessary.

The National Enquirer Claims Calling Richard Simmons Transgender Isn't an Insult - Richard/Fiona needs to put on his big girl britches and suck it up.

Cat Named 'Trouble' Allegedly Attacks Little Girl - A cat named Trouble allegedly attacked a 7-year-old girl while she was visiting her grandfather.

Donald Trump Speaking to Boy Scouts is Like a Porn Star Speaking to Girl Scouts - In a short six months Trump has trampled the Constitution, diminished the presidency, attacked the judiciary and the free press, and now he has tarnished the reputation of the venerable Boy Scouts. It's high time to impeach the loathsome son of a bitch.

Donald Trump Proclaims He Should be on Mount Rushmore - Adding Trump's orange bust to Mount Rushmore would be an abomination, only his hands should be added to Mount Rushmore. They are so tiny they won't be seen -- perfect.

Trent Reznor: Donald Trump is an (Expletive Deleted) Moron - In an interview with the Village Voice Trent Reznor didnt mince words in describing Donald Trump.

John McCain Gets Up From Deathbed to Keep Trump's Awful Health Care Bill Alive - There is a special place reserved in hell for the likes of John McCain.

'See Detroit Like We Do' Billboard Depicts Only White People - The sign could not have been more honest, Dan Gilbert the CEO of a real estate development company and the Detroit Chamber of Commerce see only the predominantly white people who work downtown and patronize the upscale restaurants and fancy boutiques.

Al-Shabab: 'Donald Trump is Stupid and Destroying America' Amen! - For every person lauding President Donald Trumps efforts to 'Make America Great Again,' another soul is staring into the depths of despair. The U.S. president certainly has his detractors-but his latest critics are an unlikely bunch: jihadis in Africa.

Dump Trump! Impeach the Abomination! - This week marks the six month point of Trumps chaotic and turbulent presidency, repealing and replacing Obamacare is a pipe dream, the Wall is a mirage, the infrastructure plan is crumbling and tax reform isnt going anywhere.

Hillary Clinton is Always on Donald Trump's Mind - When a crisis hits the White House Trump returns to campaign-style rhetoric in an attempt to shift attention away from the scandal du jour.

John McCain Should Resign Immediately - McCain is a poster boy for serving his counter unselfishly, however he is also a poster boy for term limits.

Donald Trump: Comey Used 'Golden Showers' Dossier As Leverage - Trump is his own worst enemy, he keeps mouthing off about all things Russia. I hope and pray that he will be impeached and showered with rotten eggs.

Shock Video! Mariah Carey is so Fat She Can Barely Dance! - A recent Mariah Carey performance is making the rounds on the internet after fans noticed that she wasn't dancing on stage.

Americans Aren't Naming Their Babies 'Donald' Because of Vulgarian Donald Trump - The name Donald has been losing popularity in the United States for decades, but it took its biggest drop in 2016, and Donald Trump may be the reason why.

Does Fresco Painting Prove UFOs Were Present at Christ's Crucifixion? - "Aliens were hovering around at Christs crucifixion - but the little green swine didnt lift a finger to help the son of God as he hung there.

I Can't Wait Until Robots Rule the World - The first generation robots are logical machines, encumbered by emotions, and therefore already superior to human beings.

Twerk the Twerking Kitten an Internet Sensation - A kitten that has become an internet sensation thanks to her hot dance moves has been adopted.

Farting Passenger Forces Passengers Off Airplane - I can deal with snakes on a plane, and even with jihadists on a plane, but nobody can deal with a farter on a plane.

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