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Published:November 10th, 2010 12:01 EST
my-head

Oral Sex Leads to Intercourse for Teens

By Inactive Writer

"Oral sex is often a precursor to teenagers having intercourse, concludes a new study published in Archives of Pediatric and Adolescent Medicine. The study asked more than 600 high school students in California to report on their sexual experiences by filling out surveys twice a year, from the beginning of ninth grade, in 2002, to the end of 11th grade, in 2005."

face3
Here`s my first problem: Asking high school students to honestly report to a bunch of old guys in white coats about their sexual encounters.

This story would be a veritable candidate for "most obvious news story of the year." What`s next, "teens that are gay are more likely to be bullied"? If you`re a parent and you`re sitting there at home thinking your adolescent son or daughter aren`t testing their respective genitalia somewhere, you`re probably one of the people who are shocked and taken aback by a story like "oral sex leads to intercourse."

I`m not one to think that teens are having more sex today than they were back then - if you complain about the teen birthrate today, just look at where it was in the 1950s! There were around 95 births per 1,000 teenagers age 15-19, and since then they`ve been on a sharp decline. However, I`m not going to let some study dictated by teenagers guide my eyes on this issue - I`m going to let logic do that.

More teens are taking contraceptives, mainly because they don`t want to become another one of those girls who have their lives ruined by a baby at such a young age. If that`s not a good deterrent, then they do it because carrying around that little pill case is hip and trendy and the "in" thing. Either that, or they get considered a whore. So many contradictions! Whatever the case, studies show more teens are taking the damn pill. Even more use condoms. By that logic, emerging science and better control methods have made it more enticing and safer for kids to do the nasty. Now, unless you have a raging oral STD, you don`t need a protective device for oral sex. It`s the safer option; there`s no way to get knocked up with a mouth.

Later on, those kids hear of all their classmates` more physical sexual encounters and they want to get in on the action! They don`t see a lot of these girls getting buns in their ovens, so they choose the safe route, use a rubber and start having sex. Lives everywhere are changed, everyone is happy, and little Billy is less stressed about life.

So, I have created my own obvious news story: Teens like to have sex because it`s fun, and because everyone else is doing it! Now just how on Earth could I possibly be in a position to say all of this? I`m still at the tender age of 19; I`ve seen and heard it all when it comes to teens having sex. I`ve also been lucky enough to have the Internet and all its statistical grandeur at my disposal.

So yes, maybe teens are having more sex these days after all. They know they can get away with it through the loophole of birth control and rubbers - and I say go for it. I`m not going to be one of those overbearing, authoritarian, hard-ass adults that try to deter teens from having sex - hell, most teens count on them not knowing they bump nasties. If a teen is smart enough to take appropriate measures to ensure that they don`t come home with a urine-soaked positive test, then why NOT? And here comes the deluge of reasons why sex at a young age is moronic and unnecessary. Let me say this - in a society where parents are becoming restraining, incompetent and burdening, I`d rather have a teenager safely releasing all the pressure those parents, schools and other teens put on them with sexual pleasure than drugs and booze.

We can`t keep kidding ourselves and telling teens to NOT have sex. They`re going to do it anyway, if not for the fun of it, then just to spite authority. Bring on the flow of analogies such as "well, if we told so-and-so to do this, then why don`t we do such-and-such?" I don`t care.

If you need a practical reason on why oral sex leads to intercourse for teens, I have a project for you adults or anyone surprised by the study: The next time you go to have sex, take note of what you do to get things warmed up and ready for action. I rest my case.

Note: The author of this article is no longer affiliated with theSOP.