Contact theSOPAbout theSOPSupport theSOPWritersEditorsManaging Editors
theSOP logo
Published:December 19th, 2010 10:31 EST
sarah palin

Relax! Sarah Palin The Celebrity Doesn't Pose Existential Threat To America

By Robert Paul Reyes

"Sarah Palin.

They have become two of the most incendiary words in the English language, right up there with WikiLeaks and obesityepidemic. `Sarah Palin.` Say it, write it and evoke instant wrath or rapture."


My sister , who is a born again Christian, is praying that I will experience an epiphany and accept Sarah Palin as the Second Coming of Joan of Arc. The former governor of Alaska is straight out of central casting, she`s the perfect hockey mom who loves Elvis, God, and her country. Palin has a handsome husband, a son in the military, three cute daughters and a special needs toddler. My sister and millions of evangelicals see Palin as a bulwark against the tide of ungodliness that is sweeping America.

I can point out to my sister that Palin has a paper-thin resume, the IQ of a wilted head of lettuce, and the temperament of a pig that`s being castrated, but my appeals will fall on deaf ears. When discussing Sarah Palin with true believers logic and facts don`t amount to a hill of beans.

I urge my liberal brethren to stop trying to persuade Palin fanatics that they are enthralled by an empty designer suit. Brothers and sisters, you are wasting your time.

My liberal friends you must come to embrace Palin, not as a political figure but as a Paris Hilton type celebrity. Since Palin abruptly quit her gig as governor of Alaska, she has immersed herself in celebrityhood. Enjoy Palin`s antics as she camps out with Kate Gosselin and as she cheers on Bristol on DWTS.

Find comfort in the fact that Palin`s supporters are a small minority, and she doesn`t have a snowball`s chance in hell of becoming the next President of the United States.

Palin doesn`t want to be president anyway, she`s having way too much fun being a celeb. Palin is already grooming Bristol to follow in her footsteps, it won`t be long before Bristol has a reality show of her own.

My only worry is for my sister and multitudes of other conservative Christians, they will be devastated when they finally realize that they`ve been played.

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: