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Published:February 22nd, 2012 13:00 EST
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Southern Insanity: North Carolina Hospital Evacuated Due To Bats!

By Robert Paul Reyes

"A North Carolina hospital says it has temporarily evacuated patients while it clears out a bat infestation.

Administrators at Richmond Memorial Hospital in Rockingham, N.C., said they evacuated patients during the weekend, about five weeks after the first reports of bats in patient rooms, and closed down all of the building`s facilities except for the emergency room."

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UPI

Dear God, I hope I don`t have an emergency when I`m traveling in the South, I wouldn`t want to be treated at a hospital that`s overrun with possums or bats.

If I were in a hospital room and I saw a bat, I would think I was going batty. I would request an exterminator and a psychiatrist, to be on the safe side.

The hospital staff should have offered the patients free moonshine to ease their discomfort, or at least placed garlic in their rooms to ward off the vampire bats.

The poor patients have been vaccinated -- no bats have tested positive for rabies.

A bat removal company, "Get Bats Out", has been hired to take care of the infestation. Only in the South, only in the South.

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes