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Published:April 4th, 2012 17:19 EST

Stop The Insanity: Cops Free Customer From Handcuffs At Sex Shop

By Robert Paul Reyes

"Local police had to break a man out of handcuffs Thursday.

Assistant Police Chief Ed Koether said that shortly after 3 p.m. they were called to the VIP store on the Post Road. He said a male customer, who he did not immediately identify, had been in the store trying on handcuffs when he locked himself in a pair."



The customer, whose name wasn`t released by the police, didn`t feel anything at all like a VIP. The cops were called only after store employees and the Fire Department were unable to free the man.

They should have called Lindsay Lohan, she has plenty of experience being handcuffed, by the police and her lovers. Lindsay may not be able to walk in a straight line most of the time, but I bet she can free herself from any handcuffs.

After his embarrassing ordeal, I bet from now on the hapless customer`s love life will be a lot less kinky. The fool won`t incorporate anything more kinky than Wesson oil in his sex life.

The officers tried several keys without success, they finally were able to free the man from his restraints with a pair of bolt cutters.

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