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Published:November 8th, 2012 19:45 EST

Honey Boo Boo Child Should Be Proclaimed Patron Saint Of Country Evangelicals

By Robert Paul Reyes

There aren`t many Catholics in McIntyre, Georgia where the Honey Boo Boo clan lives. The rednecks who live in that neck of the woods attend Baptist and Pentecostal churches, and they don`t look too kindly at Catholic rituals and practices.


But Bible Belt evangelicals would be well-advised to adopt the Catholic practice of declaring godly individuals saints.

I`m persuaded that most hillbillies and rednecks wouldn`t have too much of a problem if the Southern Baptist denomination proclaimed Honey Boo Boo Child a saint.

A redneck would`t mind slapping a confederate flag decal on the bumper of his truck, and hanging a Honey Boo Boo icon from his rear view mirror.

The Honey Boo statue wouldn`t protect believers from deer running across their path; on the contrary it would attract deer so they could enjoy road kill deer meat for months.

I grew up a Catholic, and I still remember a nun telling me that whenever I was in trouble I should pray: Mary and Joseph help me!

When facing temptation or danger country Christians could pray: Devil, you`d betta redneckognize I`m a believer and leave me alone.

Catholics, evangelicals and atheists should agree that nothing but good can come from invoking the name of Honey Boo Boo Child.

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