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Published:February 26th, 2013 13:57 EST

Video! Court Order: You Must Walk While You Whistle In Portland, Maine

By Robert Paul Reyes

"Residents of Portland, Maine, said they found Robert Smith a little too cheerful. He had a habit of whistling while standing outside of homes and businesses. A city ordinance lists whistling as disorderly behavior with a fine of up to $500. The Portland Press-Herald reports Smith has agreed to whistle only while in motion."



Portland, Maine must not be too busy; in downtown New York City a dude whistling would be indistinguishable from the blaring horns, boom boxes, construction noise, loud cursing and other sounds of city life.

There is precious little to whistle about, life in any city, big or small, is dreary and mind-numbing. Nothing would stress me out more than a dude standing outside my home or place of business whistling.

Thank goodness Robert Smith, 32, has agreed to whistle only while in motion. This way he will only irritate a person for a few minutes before the infernal sound of his whistling dies down.

I will put up with the drunks sleeping on sidewalks, the homeless defecating on the streets, but there is no way anybody should have to endure a man whistling on a street corner.

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