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Published:March 14th, 2013 10:51 EST

Mama (Honey Boo Boo Child's Mom) Writing A Book

By Robert Paul Reyes

"for all of u that love me, mama june, this is for u! I am writing a book bout our lives."

June Shannon (Honey Boo Boo`s mother)


June and her brood are functionally illiterate, their redneck dialect is so difficult to decipher that TLC feels compelled to close caption episodes of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. "

I can`t imagine Mama writing her own name, let alone penning a book. Mama will need the help of a ghostwriter, and in her case the ghostwriter will be a real ghost, because he or she will commit suicide in frustration before the first chapter is finished.

Mama`s book will be superfluous; she and her family are living their lives in front of the cameras for our entertainment.

A coloring book colored by Honey Boo Boo would be more intellectually stimulating that anything written by June Shannon.

Mama dear, we don`t expect you to be a Renaissance woman; all we expect from you is to belch, fart, and stuff your mouth on TV for our edification and entertainment.

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