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Published:June 22nd, 2013 11:58 EST
beer

Cops Arrest Pantless Drunk Woman Driving On Wrong Side Of Road

By Robert Paul Reyes

"Natalie Delgado wasn`t wearing any pants when she got pulled over on suspicion of DUI on Interstate 595 early Wednesday, an arrest report says.

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Delgado was traveling in the wrong direction and on the wrong side of the roadway when she was pulled over about 2:45 a.m on eastbound I-595 near State Road 7 in Davie."

HUFFINGTON POST

Delgado, 20, needs to take certain steps immediately before she becomes a hopeless alcoholic.

QUIT HER JOB AS BARTENDER

Lindsay Lohan should never take a moonlighting job working at a jewelry store, and the last thing Delgado needs is to be working as a bartender. Why surround yourself with temptation, when you know that after a couple of drinks you will ditch your pants, and drive on the wrong side of the road?

TAKE AN ETIQUETTE CLASS

Maybe she will learn that a classy lady will never drive pantless, especially when she is drunk out of her mind, and there`s a good chance she will be pulled over by a police officer.

ENROLL IN COSMETOLOGY SCHOOL

I don`t expect a woman arrested for drunk driving to look like a supermodel, but in her mugshot Delgado looks like she`s been dead for a couple of days. The skills Delgado learns in cosmetology school may land her a job, and she can also apply those skills to make herself look presentable.

STOP LYING

Delgado initially told the cop who pulled her over that she didn`t have anything to drink. A sloppy drunk is never a smooth liar; honesty is always the best policy especially for witless drunks.

ENROLL IN A 12-STEP PROGRAM

When you are drunk driving pantless on the wrong side of the road, it`s time for rehab.

Read More:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/06/21/dui-no-pants-florida_n_3476118.html

Photo Credit: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Main_Page 

robertpaulreyes@gmail.com

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