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Published:June 11th, 2014 15:40 EST

The Sierras: Hotbed of UFO Activity!

By Robert Paul Reyes

"The forest in Colfax is the beginning of the Sierras, an area that has a reputation of the weird. UFOlogists suggest that UFOs are attracted to 4 things " gold and other minerals, our DNA, our water and nuclear power plants. The Sierras does not have nuclear power plants, but it is known for gold and other mineral deposits and an abundance of water.


Mary Frances Smith Story:

The UFOs seem to appear frequently in the night skies above her home. On one particular night, she saw a disc shaped UFO and it shown a bright light into her home. During this evening at 8:08 pm, she feels she lost 45 minutes of time."


I agree with the writer for the Costa Rican Times, UFOs are attracted to four things: Trailer Parks, human rectums (alien anal probes), hillbillies, and foil caps (most folks who report UFOs have a penchant for wearing aluminum foil caps. We just disagree what four things belong on the list.

The spotlight over Mary`s house was most likely a police helicopter looking for marijuana crops.

Mary was so frightened by her experienced that she contacted a MUFON UFO investigator; I think she should have called her psychiatrist instead.

Mary told the MUFON investigator that a chunk of flesh was taken from her buttocks, I`m sure there`s an alien on the Mothership saying: This human butt takes just like chicken.

I don`t know what advice the MUFON dude gave her, but I would have counseled her to lay off the moonshine.

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