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Published:September 12th, 2014 21:09 EST
palin

Sarah Palin's Family' Epic Drunken Party Featuring Flying Fists, Rivers of Beer, Cops, and Hillbilly Hijinks

By Robert Paul Reyes

"Sarah Palin and her family were at the center of a lively party last weekend that erupted into a fight, with daughter Bristol Palin allegedly throwing a right hook, a man who says he was a guest at the party told ABC News.

palin

 

Political blogger Amanda Coyne reported that Sarah Palin, along with husband Todd and kids Bristol, Willow and Track, arrived in a stretch Hummer and that the fighting started as the beer started flowing.

 

The Palin family was asked to leave the party after Track Palin, 21, allegedly attacked another party guest who had previously dated his younger sister, Willow Palin, Thompson said. "

 

ABC News

 

Sarah Palin portrays herself as a devout evangelical Christian, and you would expect a birthday party in honor of her husband to be a sedate affair. I can imagine a Pentecostal preacher saying a benediction before the dinner, and the guests entertaining themselves by playing Bible trivia games, and perhaps some square dancing after the guests imbibe a couple of glasses of non-alcoholic champagne.

 

But Todd Palin`s birthday celebration was an epic drunken hillbilly shindig that featured flying fists, beer flowing like a river, and more hillbilly hijinks than an episode of Jerry Springer.

 

Bristol Palin equipped herself quite well; she beat the living hell out of an unidentified man.

 

At one point in the bacchanalian feast, Sarah Palin reportedly yelled: Do you know who I am? And someone reportedly replied: This ain`t no hillbilly reality show.

 

The cops were summoned to restore order, and the Palins survived without sustaining a serious injury.

 

Only Satan knows what shenanigans occurred during the epic party, but don`t be surprised if in nine months the Palin women give birth to illegitimate hillbilly babies. (pure speculation on my part.)