Contact theSOPAbout theSOPSupport theSOPWritersEditorsManaging Editors
theSOP logo
Published:November 28th, 2014 09:29 EST

Black Friday Madness: Epic Fight Breaks Out Over Cheap Thongs: Video! God Deliver Us From Ratchet Women!

By Robert Paul Reyes

You know it`s that most wonderful time of the year when strangers smile at you, Christmas hymns are heard everywhere, folks are full of good cheer and ratchet ladies fight over the same pair of cheap thongs at a shopping mall.


Black Friday madness isn`t unique to the United States, when these UK ladies saw the same pair of slutty thongs, they grabbed for them at the same time, and Armageddon breaks out. During Black Friday your typical mall resembles a jungle, where it`s every beast for herself/himself.

I urge Obama to institute an Obamathong program, before this same type of madness breaks out in the States. Is it not written in our constitution that everyone is entitled to an Obamaphone, EBT card, and a pair of stripper thongs?

Photo Credit:

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: