March 27th, 2015 11:34 EST
City Puts Up 'Stop Pooping' Signs on Bike Path
"Officials in an Illinois town said new signs reading, "Stop pooping on bike path,` are aimed at pooping people rather than defecating dogs.
Scot McKay, Public Works supervisor for the Village of Hampton, said residents might confuse the two signs, which bear an emoji-like image of a smiling pile of feces, for a message to pet owners, but they are actually a response to human droppings being found on the path multiple times during the past two years."
When a city feels compelled to erect "Stop Pooping" signs you know that Armageddon is right around the corner.
Public work officials suspect the filthy animals are humans and not dogs, because there`s usually soiled toilet paper nearby. Canines don`t have opposable thumbs so it`s unlikely they are the culprits.
Someone who drops his drawers and takes a dump on a bike trail isn`t likely to respond to a sign depicting a smiling pile of feces urging him not to poop on the bike path.
However a sign stating that there are hidden surveillance cameras might put a stop to this outdoor pooping.