April 5th, 2015 10:11 EST
Japan's Top Military Official: No Sign of UFO Invasion
"The classic video game `Space Invaders` was developed in Japan back in the late 1970`s -- and now their real-life counterparts are the topic of an earnest political discussion in Japan`s corridors of power.
Luckily, Japanese can sleep soundly in their beds tonight as the government`s top military official earnestly revealed that the country`s Air Self Defense Force (ASDF) had never encountered an extraterrestrial unidentified flying object.
Responding to a query from flamboyant former wrestler-turned-lawmaker Antonio Inoki, Defense Minister Gen Nakatani told the Diet, Japan`s parliament, that his jets had, to date, never come across any UFOs from outer space."
This UFO tomfoolery should have been nipped in the bud decades ago, but thank goodness that at least a Japanese top military official has declared that the country`s air force has never encountered an extraterrestrial flying object.
The Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff should follow the example of Defense Minister General Nakatani and state unequivocally that the American Air Force has never encountered a spacecraft of extraterrestrial origin.
Japan has more serious things in the sky than UFOs to worry about, namely missiles fired from North Korea, and certainly we also have more serious issues to consider.
I`ve got 99 problems, but a flying saucer landing on my front lawn, and a 13-foot alien stepping out and anally-probing me ain`t one of them.