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Published:April 15th, 2017 21:15 EST
trump

What Pet Should Donald Trump Get?

By Robert Paul Reyes

"Of all the stains besmirching the Trump presidency - the ethical lacunae, the spasmodic "policy" fits, the Golf Digest aesthetic - none looms so large as the absence of a White House pet. Breathes there a man with a soul so dead that he doesn`t want a loyal dog or faithful feline trotting beside him when he mounts that lonely staircase to the venerable Master Bedroom?

trump

Apparently, yes.

It seems emblematic of President Trump`s blaring tone-deafness for the office that he doesn`t even feign interest in recruiting a furry, fowlish or finny friend. Pets reap vast, humanizing rewards for presidents, as almost every one of his predecessors has discovered."

New York Times

Even Hitler had a pet, Blondi, a German Shepherd that was given to him as gift when it was a puppy. Hitler and his pooch were inseparable, Blondi stayed with her master to the bitter end, she was there with him when he finally died in his bunker.

I`m not comparing Trump to Hitler, the first rule of politics and political commentary is never compare anyone to Hitler. But Trump desperately needs a pet to soften his image.

What pet would be ideal for Trump?

Bird

Trump`s wispy hair would make an ideal nest for any bird.

Cat

Maybe not, we all know how Trump loves to grab pussy. Trump might grope a pussy cat to death.

Snake

Perfect choice! A snake is a universal symbol of evil, I can picture the evil bastard snuggling to sleep with a serpent.

Rat

Maybe not, it would be almost impossible to tell the rat apart from Trump`s aides.

Dog

It`s hard not to trust a person who loves dogs, if Trump can convince us that he loves his pooch, we might learn to tolerate him.

Read More:

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/04/15/opinion/sunday/what-kind-of-pet-should-donald-trump-get.html?_r=0

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