December 9th, 2018 16:43 EST
Pence May be Dropped From Trump's 2020 Ticket! Top 9 New Career Choices
If Mike Pence is banished from Donald Trump`s 2020 ticket, here are my top ten new career choices for him:
Just don`t place him too close to a female mannequin, he`ll sweat profusely.
Pence is straight out of central casting for this profession, his trademark furrowed brow is the perfect look when he`s examining your tax returns.
RECEPTIONIST AT A GAY BATHHOUSE
Most of us find him obnoxious, but he exudes a gay vibe that would be right at home in this environment
CHAPERONE FOR HIGH SCHOOL PROMS
We can all imagine him admonishing amorous young couples on the dance floor to "leave enough room for the Holy Ghost."
His brown nose testifies that he`s used to the smell of excrement, he wouldn`t mind picking up after the dogs in his care.
Every movie calls for a nondescript stranger who blends into the background, well Pence is a freaking beige wall.
FLUFFER FOR GAY PORN FLICKS
He`s certainly had plenty of experience fluffing up the orange clown in the White House.
BATHROOM ATTENDANT AT A 4-STAR HOTEL
Pence reeks obsequiousness and he would be a natural in this offbeat occupation.
PRESS SECRETARY FOR THE ANTI-CHRIST
I can just see him looking adoringly at the Anti-Christ as he proclaims that everyone must be branded with "666" on their hands or forehead.