Contact theSOPAbout theSOPSupport theSOPWritersEditorsManaging Editors
theSOP logo
Published:March 12th, 2019 18:18 EST
wanker

OMG! Can You Imagine Donald Trump as an Airline Pilot?

By Robert Paul Reyes

In the aftermath of an Ethiopian Airlines crash that killed all 157 passengers on board, the stable genius offered his ideas on improving airline safety.

wanker

We might be wise listen to the owner of defunct Trump Airlines, the shuttle service that operated flights from LaGuardia Airport to Logan International Airport and Ronald Reagan Airport.

Maybe not, after all the fuc*ing moron bankrupt Trump Airlines in less than five years due to his mismanagement and incompetence.

Here`s what the engineer-in-chief had to say, on Twitter of course:

Airplanes are becoming far too complex to fly. Pilots are no longer needed, but rather computer scientists from MIT. I see it all the time in many products. Always seeking to go one unnecessary step further, when often old and simpler is far better. Split second decisions are....

... needed, and the complexity creates danger. All of this for great cost yet very little gain. I don`t know about you, but I don`t want Albert Einstein to be my pilot. I want great flying professionals that are allowed to easily and quickly take control of a plane!

We don`t need Albert Einstein or a computer scientist from MIT flying commercial airplanes, and we also don`t need tips from a businessman who has several bankruptcies under his belt telling us how to run an airliner or any other business.

I wouldn`t be surprised if Trump petitions the FAA to reduce cruising altitude from 35,000 feet to five thousand feet so commoners will be able to read the Trump logo when he`s flying one of his private jets.

Can you imagine Trump as an commercial airline pilot?

I`d like to welcome the ladies and gentlemen on first class, never mind the losers flying coach.

My copilot for this flight is Mike Pence, his primary responsibility is serving me coffee and fluffing my hair. But in case of an emergency, the Holy Roller will recite a prayer over the PA system.

But don`t worry! This will be a beautiful flight, believe me! I will probably set a world record getting you to your destination.

To reduce tension and anxiety feel free to flirt with all the stewardesses, believe me, they are all hot! I picked the bitches myself!

I`d like to ease your mind by informing you that there are no therapy animals onboard this flight, crapping and pissing all over the cabin. God, how I hate puppies, kittens and all fluffy animals that losers and mental cases rely on for comfort.

Pence you moron! Wait until I get up to stretch my legs before you try to kiss my ass. Sorry, ladies and gentlemen, it`s so hard to get good help these days.

Thank God Trump isn`t a pilot, engineer or anything having to do with the airline business.

Photo Credit: Wikipedia

Link to homepage of Robert Paul Reyes: http://robertpaulreyes.com