February 21st, 2007 16:00 EST
Top 10 Excuses for Missing Work
"The world is full of willing people, some willing to work, the rest willing to let them. "
By Robert Frost
As children when we forgot to do our homework, we simply told our teachers the dog ate or my personal favorite I didn`t have any paper " and when we did not want to go to school we suddenly came down with the 6 hour flu where Aspirin and Robitussin seemed to fail miserably. In contrast to that, the miraculous all healing miracle of seeing our friends get off the bus after school was an amazing cure all.
However, it turns out there is an adult version of the same affliction. Only now our excuses are much more elaborate when faking an illness when we do not want to go to work. Unfortunately, many employers have to deal with these excuses on a far too regular basis.
As a result of this, the overall economy is affected in more ways than you may think. According to Attendance Management - working together (http://www.benefits.org/interface/cost/absent.htm), the Cost of Absenteeism causes more than just headaches and inconveniences for your co-workers. It also causes a decrease in productivity, financial and administrative losses.
Illness is becoming the most common excuse for missing work. Thanks to all those Convenient Care outpatients who use these excuses so they may simply relax, catch up on sleep, or go on an early weekend excursion. The only thing they are lacking is a note from their mother.
Car trouble is also on the list of excuses. People usually say that they had a car accident, their car would not start, or even that their car was stolen. It is incomprehensible why anyone would want to speak negative things about themselves. We`ve all heard the saying, be careful what you wish for? "
Another classic excuse for missing work is for employees with children, to use them as an excuse. After all, who does not sympathize with a sick child? The only catch is that you have to make sure your child does not answer the telephone when a concerned co-worker calls to check on you.
Many employees have had an aunt, uncle, or cousin who died randomly causing them to have to attend a funeral. The only downfall is now you have to remember not to ever mention the name of the family member who supposedly died.
The sick child excuse and the funeral excuse can be categorized as family emergencies. However, sometimes the category itself is used as a reason for missing work with little or no explanation behind it.
The excuses that people use are continually getting more ridiculous such as, over sleeping, doctors appointment, or my house was broken into and I am upset as well as I thought I was off for the day.
All of these excuses exhibit childish behavior and the bottom line is these people are ruining it for people who are telling the truth. Hence, all of the employed liars should just come up with some creative new ways to call off from work such as changing their religion so that they may observe more holidays such as Hanukah or even Festivas or my dog swallowed the "K " while in the middle of a high stakes game of Scrabble.