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Published:October 2nd, 2006 14:10 EST

Canada Knows About Borders

By SOP newswire

This week I am in Coronach, Canada... population 940. It was named after a race horse, and is right on the American border, which makes "em our neighbors... in case you need a cup of sugar or oil or even natural gas. Although small, this town has all three. They even have a curling rink and a darn good border control.

Now, crossing into Canada is nothing like the border to Tijuana, Mexico. No sir. I was stopped at the Canadian border for over 2 hours with questions about work permits, gun permits, and licenses. If I would have talked to the patrol any longer, I might have been accused of building a rapport, and that would definitely need a permit.

A side note for anyone wanting to visit this very pretty land: if you have had any sort of run in with the law in the past 5 years, then ya better turn around " not speaking from experience. They won`t let you in unless you spend many more hours and some money to get yourself a pass.

Word traveled fast that I had reached the border. When I got to Coronach, 80% of the folks in town knew of my time at the border, the other 20% were out of town.

Anyhow, Coronach is home of the Big Muddy Badlands formed by melting glaciers. The reason it is called the "Badlands" is "cuz outlaws like Butch Cassidy hid in the caves from the law! This local mascot, is called the Big Muddy, but all I saw was green.

Make sure you fill your tank before you cross the border.
Gas was $4.50 a gallon American money, only they disguise it as liters, so you think you are getting a better deal " a raw deal for "em considering they help make the stuff. They also have one of the first all-alternative filling stations where you can get bio-diesel and two ethanol blends, organic snacks, natural soda pop and organic coffee.

In case you are wondering what the Canadians think of Americans, they are quite fond of us and have no intention of spending any money on fences to keep us out. If we all had neighbors like the Canadians we would never have wars. You can ask the Lebanese, they have an estimated 250,000 still living in Canada from the last Lebanese war. Now, I have a plan: we can partner with Canada, they watch our borders and we will give them a better price on gas.