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Published:September 9th, 2008 19:14 EST
Crazy Burglar Wakes Up Men With Spice Rub

Crazy Burglar Wakes Up Men With Spice Rub

By Robert Paul Reyes

"Authorities say they`ve arrested a man who broke into the home of two California farmworkers, stole money, rubbed one with spices and whacked the other with a sausage before fleeing.

Fresno County sheriff`s Lt. Ian Burrimond says 22-year-old Antonio Vasquez was found hiding in a field wearing only a T-shirt, boxers and socks after the Saturday morning attack."

Associated Press

A reporter once asked notorious bank robber Willie Sutton why he robbed banks and he replied: I rob banks, that`s where the money is.

Vasquez hasn`t learned this fundamental truth about the art of burglary. How much money is he going to get from the home of an impoverished farmworker?

Vasquez needs to fine another line of work, perhaps as a masseur or a sausage maker.

If you`re going to wake up a guy by rubbing him with spices, you should be toting something more formidable than a sausage. The clown is lucky he didn`t end up in a hospital instead of jail.