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Published:October 15th, 2008 21:54 EST
Barack Obama's 14-Point Lead. Another Fairy Tale?

Barack Obama's 14-Point Lead. Another Fairy Tale?

By John Lillpop

According to a recent poll conducted by CBS and the New York Times, Barack Obama has opened a commanding 14-point leader over John McCain. That news is sure to deflate Republicans while spreading great joy among Democrats.

However, before cracking open an expensive bottle of champagne to celebrate a Democrat victory, or alternatively, before buying a cheap revolver with which to escape a certain outbreak of Obamamania, please remember that polls are not always what they appear to be.

For example, consider the fact that the CBSNYT poll was limited to the following voting blocs and locations:

-Sleeper cells.

-ACORN employees and supervisors.

-La Raza, CAIR, and ACLU offices.

-The UN building.

-Day labor centers (English speakers excluded)

-Black universities and colleges.

-Opinion editors at the Los Angeles Times, San Francisco Chronicle, and Washington Post.

-CBS and New York Times staff members and pre-screened family, and

-The entire city of San Francisco.

In addition to devising a science-based model for sampling and analysis of polling data, the CBSNYT poll questions were prepared with painstaking care in order to secure an objective and unbiased measurement of public opinion.

Sample poll questions included these:

Q: Would you vote for Barack Obama if voting for the other guy would mean eight more years of George W. Bush and a dumb, female version of Dick Cheney?

Q: Are you aware of the fact that John McCain is related by blood to that racist bogeyman, the late George Wallace?
Does that knowledge make it more likely that you will vote for Barack Obama?

Q: If you were offered a job by ACORN as a community organizer with a starting salary of $100,000 per year and a fabulous benefits package, would you vote for Barack Obama?

Q: Vice President Sarah Palin reportedly takes sporting pleasure in shooting people of color when Alaska`s moose and bear hunting season is over. Does that documented fact increase the probability that you will vote for Barack Obama?

Q: Are you interested in solving America`s problems including the Iraq war, soaring home foreclosures, total collapse of the economy, skyrocketing inflation, high unemployment, a continuing energy crisis, global warming, failure of the systems of education, and persistent racism? Would you vote for Barack Obama if you knew he could fix these issues?

Q: John McCain is a 72-year old man with health problems. Barack Obama is a young and vital man who is clean and articulate and in perfect health. Do you agree that electing an old man with health problems, who might very well die in office, is a bad idea? Would you prefer to elect a qualified young man who is in perfect health and likely to be around for a second term?

With those questions being posed to the voting blocks indicated, it is a miracle that Obama is not leading by triple digits or more!

Remember that more often than not, polls are used to manipulate, rather than measure, public opinion!