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Published:November 25th, 2008 12:52 EST
Deluxe Public Toilets

Deluxe Public Toilets Feature TV's And Tuxedo-clad Attendants

By Robert Paul Reyes

I wouldn`t use most public restrooms unless I had a mask and latex gloves. When I have no choice but to patronize a public toilet, I hold my nose and do my business before I`m forced to take a breath.

"Speed" starring Keanu Reeves is a horrifying movie about a bus filled with passengers that must keep moving above 50 miles per hour or it will explode. But what`s even more scary is taking a cross country trip on a Greyhound bus, and having no option but to use the stinky toilet in the bus.

For a few days in the holiday season there are some public restrooms in New York that are the envy of the civilized world.

"What a relief! The free public restrooms operated by the Charmin toilet paper company in Times Square during the holidays are being rolled out for another year.

It`s the third straight year for the 20 deluxe stalls.

The plush potties feature flat-screen televisions, attendants dressed in tuxedos and plenty of Charmin."

The Associated Press

I can`t imagine a public restroom that feature TV`s and tuxedo-clad attendants; every major city should have at least one public restroom that features such civilized amenities. My small town doesn`t have much to offer, if we installed one of those fancy toilets it would quickly become the leading tourist attraction. I may write a column for my hometown newspaper advocating that we install deluxe public toilets. Thinking about it just makes me flush with pride!