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Published:August 20th, 2008 11:59 EST
Slit-Eyed Gestures: Hispanic Racism, or Crude Tomfoolery?

Slit-Eyed Gestures: Hispanic Racism, or Crude Tomfoolery?

By John Lillpop

Legend has it that the Olympics are supposed to bring people from diverse races, nationalities, and cultures together so that greater understanding and appreciation can be achieved to the overall betterment of humanity.

Diversity acceptance on steroids, as it were!

However, in 2008, the Olympics appear to have fostered a wave of anti-Chinese racism or, depending on one`s views, simplistic tomfoolery among Hispanic people.

Olympic team members from both Spain and Argentina have been seen in photographs pulling back the skin on the side of their eyes, in a crude impersonation of Chinese people.

Last week it was athletes from Spain who were exposed for their slit-eyed shenanigans.

Just when that controversy began to ebb, the shocking photograph of Argentine football players surfaced. It shows four Hispanic women engaged in slit-eyed gestures, clearly mocking the appearance of Chinese people.

The photograph shows players Maria Potassa, Eva Gonzalez, Fabiana Vallejos and Andrea Ojeda smiling broadly as they torment Chinese people everywhere.

Officials from China and Argentina have yet to comment formally, although insiders at the US State Department believe that these incidents have set diversity acceptance back at least 50 years and could result in a China versus Spain and Argentina war unless cooler heads prevail.

News of the slit-eyed gesture phenomenon has reached every corner of the globe, including the campaign trials in America where Barack Obama and John McCain continue to campaign before thousands of people who could care less about anything either of these toads has to say about anything.

From the streets of Chicago, Barry (Barack Obama) tried to manipulate the news for tacky political gain by suggesting that Chinese parents should make sure that their children can speak Spanish, just in case Hispanic athletes decide to apologize.

Out in the hot Arizona desert, John McCain declined to comment, but pointed out that making fun of slit-eyed people damn near caused him to lose the family jewels (his gonads) during the Vietnam war.

And out in California, the ACLU announced that it was recruiting 3,500 recent law school graduates to go into immediate training for the 2012 Olympics in London so as to cover the expected carnage when English is the language of the host nation.

In addition, La Raza, also known as the Brown KKK, announced that it will be in London in 2012 as well, just to "make sure the Brits don`t push that English crap too far."

Still, there is a bright side to all this: With both the ACLU and La Raza stalking good people in London, real Americans will be free to kick a few million illegal aliens back across the border!