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Published:March 13th, 2009 14:27 EST
Lindsay Lohan Markets Spray-On Tan

Lindsay Lohan Markets Spray-On Tan

By Robert Paul Reyes


Everything about Lindsay Lohan reeks of duplicity, from her air-brushed images on the covers of fashion and entertainment magazines to her her lesbian relationship with Sam Ronson. There is no doubt that Ronson is a genuine lesbian, but Lindsay is a trysexual, she`ll try any sexual coupling that will garner publicity.

The plastic pop princess has found the perfect product to endorse: A self-tanning misting spray. Getting a tan the old-fashioned way by baking in the sun is an exercise in stupidity, vanity and deceit. A pearly-white Caucasian with a tan may look like a Latina for a few months, but when the cold weather arrives her true colors will be revealed.

A tan from a bottle is even more fake, but at least it`s not quite as dangerous as exposing yourself to the harmful rays from the sun.

"Hollywood singer-actress Lindsay Lohan has branched out in the world of beauty and is set to launch her own line of self-tanning products in April.

Called Sevin Nyne, the tan uses caramel instead of colouring and a sugar-coconut base and chardonnay extracts to achieve the golden glow."

A fake tan that uses natural ingredients -- how quaint.

The Lindsay endorsed tanning products offers no SPF protection, if you have a burning desire to look like an orange colored version of Lindasay Lohan you don`t deserve any sunburn protection.

The $35 spray will become available exclusively in Sephora stores on May 1, 2009. Anyone who spends $35 for Lindsay Lohan`s faux glow should have his head examined.