February 21st, 2009 13:50 EST
Did Google Ocean Discover Atlantis?
Google Street View captured an Australian man passed out drunk in front of his house, Google Earth discovered a pristine forest in Mozambique, and the Google search engine can be used to find dirt on your old high school pals and ex-girlfriends. But has Google Ocean discovered the Lost City of Atlantis?
Yesterday, I heard a news tease on Fox News: Google Ocean discovers Lost City of Atlantis, stay tuned for this incredible story after a short commercial break. I was on my way out the door, and I didn`t have time to wait for the story. On my way to work I contemplated the significance of this discovery, and I came to the conclusion that I hoped it was a prank.
Atlantis will never be found by an archeologist wearing a Fedora hat, if it`s ever discovered it will be by the omnipotent and omniscient Google.
But I hope archaeologists will never discover the Lost City of Atlantis; I pray that adventurers will never capture the Abominable Snowman, and I hope that Lochness Monster will never be trapped.
If the Abominable Snowman is apprehended in less than a month we will be sick and tired of him. Within a few days the beast will be doing commercials for Geico, and within a month he will have his own reality show. And if Atlantis is discovered within a few years it will become an underwater amusement park, complete with a Trump Atlantis Tower.
Fortunately, as it turns out Google Ocean did not discover the fabled city of Atlantis:
"The Lost City of Atlantis is still lost - despite hopes that Google Earth had located the fabled city on the floor of the Atlantic Ocean.
Observers noted what seemed to be a grid of streets and the outlines of a big city on the sea floor about 960km (600 miles) off the African coast.
But Google said the lines represented sonar data collected from boats." http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/7903169.stm
Atlantis can remain pristine in our imaginations, and it is free from the likes of Donald Trump. May the lost city of Atlantis remain forever undetected and undiscovered underwater.