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Published:September 13th, 2007 02:59 EST
Opting Out of Osama's 'Caravan of Martyrs'

Opting Out of Osama's 'Caravan of Martyrs'

By John Lillpop

As a right wing Christian wacko and card-holding infidel, I fully appreciate the fact that Osama bin Laden's call for a 'caravan of martyrs' was not directed at me or those like me.

His target audience was obviously young Muslim men who speak Arabic, are devoted to Islam, and are willing to blow themselves into pizza topping in order to win the company of 72 virgins in the sexual paradise sure to follow.">
Daily Mail:

Although I am not a candidate for Osama's Jihad, I do have some good old fashioned common sense questions that all young Muslim men should ask before signing up for Osama's suicide brigade.

First and foremost: 

If ramming an airplane carrying 10,000 gallons of jet fuel into a New York skyscraper is a heroic act of martyrdom that will please Allah and bring boundless glory to Islam, why in the Hell has Osama bin Laden not made that sacrifice himself?

Why has OBL not turned himself into a smoldering piece of charcoal, for the good of Islam?  Or for the good of Osama, for that matter, if the martyr's earned reward is really 72 voluptuous virgins?

Think about it.

Six years ago, Mohamned Atta and eighteen other Muslim brothers followed Osama's orders and were vaporized in hell fire so intense that it melted steel.

Nineteen smudges of burning human DNA are all that remained of Mohamned Atta, following their OBL-ordered murders of September 11, 2001.

And what of the personal fortunes of Osama bin Laden himself since 911?

Six years later, this seven-foot cowardly terrorist is still servicing his various and sundry harems in air conditioned, upscale caves in Pakistan and showing no signs of slowing down.

So while the vaporized blobs that used to be Mohamned Atta et al., are buried under tons and tons of infidel ruins in America, this bearded weasel is busy making self-promoting videos and babies instead of suicide explosions featuring his own corrupt self.

Self-respecting Muslim men, awaken!

Osama bin Laden's latest recruitment for a 'Caravan of martyrs' should be answered with the following challenge: After you, Osama!