October 7th, 2008 13:33 EST
Sarah Palin and The Starbucks Quote of The Day
"`It`s like kind of providential yesterday what happened to me,` Palin said. `I am reading on my Starbucks mocha cup the quote of the day. You`ll never believe what the quote was! It was Madeleine Albright, former secretary of state and U.N. ambassador, and Madeleine has as her quote of the day for Starbucks - now she said it, I didn`t say it - `There is a place in hell reserved for women who don`t support other women.` OK now, thank you so much for receiving that well, I didn`t know how that was gonna go over. And now California, let`s see what a comment like I just made, let`s see what it will be turned into . . . newspaper.`"
Whenever I reference Sarah Palin I feel like I`m back in high school writing for the school newspaper, and capturing the immortal words of the grammar-impaired football hero.
When a quotation starts with "It`s like kind of", you know the person isn`t channeling William Shakespeare. Palin employs these folksy colloquialisms to appeal to Joe-Sixpack and hockey moms.
The next word in the Palin citation is "providential"; Palin rarely makes a speech without pandering to her evangelical base. "Providential is evangelical-speak for "God`s will".
Palin goes on to say, "I was reading on my Starbucks mocha cup quote of the day"; Palin may not read the New York Times or the Wall Street Journal but you betcha she reads Starbucks cups. Reading a Washington Post editorial is too taxing for Palin, but she is able to digest a quote at a time.
Palin quotes from Madeleine Albright, and she identifies her as the former secretary of state and U.N. ambassador. I`m betting that Palin learned the identity of Albright from a member of her staff
It`s one lousy quote, but Palin manages to mess it up, she substituted "support" for "help". They may be synonyms, but it is a distinction with a difference. The word "support" conveys the meaning of political support. As a newspaper columnist who is often misquoted, I feel there`s a special place in hell for yahoos who misquote public figures.
Palin is playing the gender card like a virtuoso, she`s implying that women should blindly support her because of her gender. I would hope that men and women would realize that Palin is an empty skirt who is utterly unqualified to be vice-president.
My Palin mention ends with this warning: And now California, let`s see what a comment like I just made, let`s see what it will be turned into. Well Palin, gosh darn it all to heaven, do you like what this liberal hell-bound columnist did with your comment?
I have a headache from deconstructing Palin`s brief quotation; I hope I will never have to parse a long Palin reference.