January 20th, 2010 19:01 EST
The 10 Comments from Massachusetts Election
The following is submitted by Randall Terry, Director, Insurrecta Nex:
10) Ted Kennedy: "I might be dead, but Sarah Palin is on the phone...with Fox cable. Wow, what a superstar!"
9) Sarah Palin: "Ted Kennedy is dead?"
8) Barack Obama: "Is Martha dark skinned enough to say this was a racist vote?"
7) Harry Reid: "She doesn`t sound like a negro."
6) Nancy Pelosi: "This was a referendum on Wall street, not Barry. We will go forward with raping the American people. Who wants to play doctor?"
5) Martha Coakley: "I think our dogs went poopoo on the carpet; but now they`re dead from dehydration...so they wont do that again. I always said we had a dysfunctional family; thank you Vickie for channeling your inner Teddy!
4) Rachel Maddow: "If Scott was `bi,` I would still think he was hot as a truck driver. And he reads a teleprompter so much better than Barry..."
3) Rahm Emmanuel: "Hey, the Lord is with us...just check out my name, dude. Hey...what are we smoking...this is some good stuff...just check out my name, dude."
2) Arnold Schwarzenegger: "Scott is the next poster child for the GOP; he`s just like me - a RINO - only he was born in the USA...and I could whip his girly man butt."
1) Scott Brown: "Stop looking at my daughter`s collar bones! The force is with Ted Kennedy...Vickie just could not get him dialed in. I cannot replace Teddy; but I will be a worthy successor to his "upbeat, baby-killing agenda;" I will rage against the machine! Here`s a secret - my wife Gail! And hey guys - my daughters are "available..." if you know what I mean. But rest assured: if Arnold Schwarzenegger hits on them - I will beat him like a dirty rug, and the pro-life, pro-marriage movements along with him. Then I`ll drive my truck to DC to play ball with Barry and my new friend - John McCain. I - like him - don`t know what the hell I believe, except that I - like John, and Barry, and Teddy - want to be President."