August 1st, 2009 18:49 EST
The Holy Spirit is Like a Ghost Right Next to You
No really, the Holy Spirit is like that. Like a ghost right next to you. I`m not kidding. And I`m not lying either. I can`t lie anymore. That`s a sin. And I guess I shouldn`t say "can`t." I mean... I can... lie, that is. But I`m not supposed to. That`s what I mean. And if I do, on accident that is, then I have to say I`m sorry real quick and then promise to try as best I can not to do it again. That`s called repentance. When you do something Jesus said not to you have to do that. Then you won`t be so likely to do it again. That is, if you`re really sorry. Just like anything, if you think about it. If you`re really sorry about doing something then you`ll be a lot less likely to do it again.
But so anyway, like I was saying, the Holy Spirit is a, spiritual essence. " Or at least that`s what those bible braniac guys call it. Which is really just a fancy word for ghost. So I just say it`s a ghost you know? I mean, why beat around the bush? Cut the crap, that`s my motto. Ooops. I better repent again. Just a second. Sorry Lord. And please help me not to cuss no more like that. Amen.
But so where was I? Oh yeah. But He`s not like just any old ordinary ghost, of course. The Holy Spirit that is. I mean, it`s a part of God too after all. You know, the old Father, Son and the Holy Ghost thing. You`ve probably heard about all that I bet. But so it`s like God in the form of a ghost. Which is why I say it`s like a ghost right next to you all the time. Because God is everywhere all the time, so it only figures. And it`s funny too, not funny ha ha, but it`s funny how, once you get to know Him, the Holy Spirit that is... but once you get to know Him, you can always sense Him right there with you. Or I can at least. But so too, that`s why I say it`s like a ghost right next to you all the time, if you see what I mean.
But anyway, I met the Holy Spirit this one morning after work when all I was doing was trying to go to sleep. Which, as maybe you can imagine, can be kinda hard sometimes when you work nights and you get home and it`s the morning and bright out and everything. But so to help I had turned on my clock radio to this Christian station because they were playing this like really boring music that I figured would knock me right out. But then this guy came on reading from the bible and I was only just barely listening and BLAMMO! The next thing I knew I was crying and rolling around on my bed and I could hardly breath and- well, we`ll go into all the details later, like I said. I wrote a whole chapter about it.
But what I`m saying is, that was the Holy Spirit. Or that`s what I gotta figure anyway. Because the bible says it can come and get you like that. Especially when you`re, "under the hearing of the word," as the bible calls it. And by, "the word," they mean the word of God, which is the bible. So you see what I`m saying?! That`s how I was. Under the hearing, like they say. And the word was coming through my radio. But I`m sure that counts too.
And then another reason I know it was the Holy Spirit is because not too long after that, like maybe a month or two, slowly but surely I was starting to grow more and more interested in learning about the bible and Jesus and God and all that. And for no good reason at all either. Well... you know what I mean. And I`ll go into more detail about all that later too. But what I`m saying is, the bible also says that this is what will happen. When you meet the Holy Spirit that is. And like I`m saying, I had no clue that the bible said this would happen. But it happened anyway. I mean, it`s not like I thought to myself, well... I want to be with God... so just let me do this... and this... and this... and then I will be. There! Isn`t that wonderful... ahhh... now I`m enlightened.
No. It wasn`t like that at all. That`s what I`m saying. And that`s what makes it even more real. I mean, it`s like the Holy Spirit came into me, though I didn`t even know what had happened. And then it also at the same time started guiding me to the bible. Where I would then find out that it was doing all this stuff. After the fact, as they say in legal circles, and all that.
And it was weird too how I was like driven to read the bible and learn all about all this stuff. I don`t know how else to explain it. I mean I was obsessed. Like I`d been brainwashed or something. Like that Manchurian Candidate thing, you know. I mean, before I could give a rat`s a- oops. Hey... it worked. I caught myself that time before I cussed. Thank you Lord.
But so you see what I mean? All this stuff started happening. And just because I heard the bible through the radio like that. So how weird is that? But there`s even more. Because then this other really weird thing started happening to me too. It`s called the, "opening of my spiritual eyes and ears." Which is another thing the bible says will happen when the Holy Spirit gets into you. Which means that like all of a sudden the bible came alive for me. I mean, I like knew it was all true. Just like right away. And everyone I read about in the bible felt like they were my family. Like Noah and Moses and King David and Daniel and all the Apostles... heck, everybody in there. Except like the devil and all the bad guys, of course. And too, as I read I could just see everything happening... like I was there even. I mean, it was like the bible was about MY God and MY people. Which is the way it`s supposed to be, like I`m saying. When this happens to you, that is. When you`re born again. Which is another way they call all of this stuff happening to you. Being born again. Which makes sense too. Because if you`re born again you have a new family now. And that`s the family of God. Which is who`s in the bible after all. Hey! That`s pretty good! Did I think of that? And not that you don`t still have your earthly family too. Who now you`ll love even more than before too. But we`ll get into all that later as well...
And then another thing too about this, "spiritual eyes and ears," stuff is that all of a sudden I was starting to understand everything. The meaning of Life and the Universe and just everything! I`m not kidding! All of a sudden I just knew what it all meant. And just imagine how exciting that is. I mean, like all the really important questions in your life, like, who am I, and why am I here, and what`s my purpose, and all that. The bible answers all those questions! Really it does! And basically, it`s like this... you were created by God... to serve Him... and then find your way back home to Him. That`s it. It`s that simple.
Which is funny too. Because like in all those movies and stuff where those super rich and powerful evil dudes and all those super smart philosophers and all are wanting to know the answers to these questions, and too, they want to know how to live forever and all that. That`s like their ultimate quest, you know.
Yo, dudes. " I could just yell at them. Get Jesus. Get born again! Then it`ll all come clear. And you`ll live forever too! " But you know they wouldn`t listen. You just know they wouldn`t. And then the bible explains that too. It says that the teachings in the bible will be just a buncha gibberish to, "those who are perishing." And that`s everyone who hasn`t been born again yet.
And another thing about all this born again, " stuff is that the Holy Spirit gives you a, new and resurrected soul. " Ot that`s how those bible braniac guys put it. And then they also say that Jesus, through the Holy Spirit, starts doing a, "mighty work in you," turning you into a Christian, like I`m saying. Which, like I`m sure you`ve also heard, doesn`t mean you`re perfect. But you`re supposed to try and be. The bible calls that, "striving for Godliness," or, "believing unto righteousness." Which is also what that repentance stuff is all about. That`s how you become a new creature in Christ. " So it`s like being born again, get it? You become a whole new person. And plus that other part too about your new family with God that I mentioned.
And the reason that`s so important is because you remember how Jesus got crucified and all that? Well, that happened to pay for our sins. Which is why we gotta get made over again. You see God is perfect, like maybe you`ve heard too. And we`re all screwed up. That`s what happened with Satan and all, if you`ll remember, going all the way back to the beginning. In the Garden of Eden and all that. And I know some people don`t want to believe that. But to me it`s kinda obvious. Just watch the news sometime. Or drive on the freeway. We`re pretty screwed up allright though. If you ask me.
But so that`s why God can`t let you into heaven. No screwups allowed. You think he wants to go through all that again? And the only way we can get perfect again, just like God, is through Jesus. Only He, "... can wash all our sins away," as they say. And God just aint gonna settle for anything less. He can`t. It`s the Law, like they say in them commercials. But it`s a cosmic law, you know. Like gravity. Like a black hole. Which is a little something God made too.
And well, that`s sorta how it works anyway. I don`t know, it`s all pretty confusing to me. And that`s why I added that, " or something like that... " to the title of this book. It`s all really hard to explain very good. But I hope I at least helped a little. And like I`m saying too, we`ll be going over all this stuff as we go along throughout this whole book. And it`ll be alot funner that way anyway too. With all the stories and stuff, that is. Which is how I`m supposed to write anyway. I remember how my creative writing teachers were always harping on us about that. About, "showing," you stuff, instead of just, "telling," it to you.
Which is a good point after all. And you want to know what`s really cool? Jesus knew that too, like 2000 years ago or whatever. NO... REALLY! That`s why He taught in parables, which is just a fancy word for stories. But stories with word pictures. Because He knew that too. And who do you think knew about it first? HMMMM!? Man, I wish I woulda known that back then, back in my college days and all that. I coulda dropped that bomb on one of my teachers, you know... just mention the word Jesus in a classroom and they`d just freak.
But so anyway I guess we`ll just get started. Started with my book. And I hope you don`t mind if it`s not too super well organized and everything. I mean, we`ll probably be hopping back and forth in my life as we go. Because to be honest, I kinda think that`s what the Holy Spirit was doing too. Hopping back and forth in my life I mean. Well... you`ll see what I mean. But we better just get started. Let`s just get started...