August 6th, 2009 16:38 EST
Careful What You Wish For
4 If you see your brother`s donkey or his ox fallen on the road, do not ignore it. Help him get it to its feet.
Well " so anyway " I know there were lots of things, lots of pieces in the puzzle, that lead up to my meeting with the Holy Spirit like I did. And I mean going way back. Lots of them. Things that happened a long time ago that I would have thought no way could they have helped bring me to the Lord. But they did.
Like in the story of Joseph in the bible and how his brothers were screwing around with him one day and it ended up with Joseph getting stuck in this well and then taken into Egypt as a slave. But then he ended up like saving the whole country because God put him into so much authority there and he helped pharaoh save his people by getting them through this horrible drought. Joseph had become like the secretary of the interior for Egypt or whatever and showed the pharaoh he needed to ration stuff because a big drought and famine was coming... something like that. But then when Joseph met his brothers again, he like totally forgave them because, though you meant it for evil, God meant it for good, " he said.
Which is like my whole point. Because just like Joseph, now I can see too that a lot of the bad stuff that happened early on in my life helped bring me to God. Believe it or not.
Like how when I was just a little kid and my parents got a divorce and me and my three sisters stayed with my mom and my dad had to move out. And I`m pretty sure that I was like already really attached to my mom anyway, you know, like most little boys are, but then when she died a few years later from lung cancer I just got like really pissed at God and the whole world and everybody. I just sort of turned my back on everything and everyone. Sometimes I even cussed at God and Jesus. I remember that. I`m not too proud of it, but I have to be honest.
And the funny thing is though, I really think that may have been when God or Jesus or the Holy Spirit decided to adopt me like. Because I wouldn`t listen to anyone back then. Nobody could tell me what to do. Especially my dad or step-mom. Which I bet they would tell you too, come to think of it. But I was still a pretty good kid overall somehow. I mean, I wasn`t like a juvenile delinquent or anything. Though I probably should have been. Or at least could have been. Which is why I think God probably stepped in way back then. Because I was actually pretty good for a little kid. But so like I`m saying, kinda like what happened with Joseph and coulda really screwed him up, coulda screwed me up too. But thanks to God, we both got through it.
And so too like I`m also saying, I know I could go all the way back there to start this book if I really wanted. And I may end up writing about all that stuff anyway later. But for now I`d rather come up closer to the present. At least partway that is. For starters I want to tell you about the more exciting and way out there stuff. Which is probably when God really sealed the deal too, as you might say. Then we can go back to look at other things that happened earlier. And then too the cool and fun stuff I`m getting into with God today after that. That`s sorta the plan for now anyway.
And the way out there suff started this was one day about twenty years ago when I was working at a gas station. Or I should really say, this one time probably opened the door for that stuff to start happening. This one day at the gas station.
And I was ok with working at a gas station at the time. But at the age of like thirty something I was starting to realize time was ticking, you know. Like I really needed to find a, "more challenging and fulfilling career, " as they say on those commercials. And not that I hadn`t been trying. I`d been going to college for like ten years. Or even more. And I`d tried at least a half a dozen different majors. Nothing seemed to fit though. Nothing really seemed to float my boat, as they say. I always just sort of lost interest.
So anyway, I guess you could say I was pretty much just spinning my wheels. Although one good thing had come out of my life at this time. I`d discovered, while working at the gas station, how much I really liked helping people. You know, like the little old lady without very much money who couldn`t pump her own gas so I`d do it for her at the self-serve island. Or the little kid who couldn`t put air into his bike tire so I`d do it for him. But just lots of people would come in with all kinds of problems and I`d help them out... giving directions " cleaning all their windows instead of just the windshield " all that sort of stuff.
And I was noticing how when I did this, whenever I helped someone like this, I would get like this little warm ball of happiness down inside me. Like right between my stomach and my chest sort of. Which was really cool. Nothing else in my life was doing that for me, that was for sure. And that little happiness thing seemed to even be getting stronger and stronger the more good stuff I did for people. A little later on, like maybe a couple years or so, I would eventually figure out that I should go into a career helping people, and then I did. You`ll see later what I mean. But as for now I hadn`t figured that out yet. So I just kept working at the gas station for then.
Then one day though, and I do remember this like very clearly, which I think is another big clue that it is definitely a piece of the old puzzle, though this part wasn`t too supernatural or anything, like I was saying, but I think maybe it opened the door, like I was saying also. But anyway, this one afternoon, and I know it was an afternoon because right now I can still see it in my mind, like it`s a photograph almost. But this one afternoon I had gone back into the tire bay, which was like a little room off to the side in the garage area. And the way I know it was the afternoon was because of the color of the light coming into the tire bay through this big window it had. I can still see that light coming through that big window that let you see out into the office area and then to the pumps out front too. You know, you had to keep an eye on the pumps all the time and all that stuff too. So they had this big window there. But I still remember exactly the color of the light that was coming through that window into the darker area of the tire bay. And that`s weird too, how that scene is like burned into my memory " and that light " the color of that light " like I said " like a photograph.
But so anyway, the tire bay was a good place to take a quick break, and that`s what I was doing, just sitting there right on the lip of the old tire mounting machine, watching the pumps. And I know now I must have been thinking about how much I liked helping people too, because then I just came right out and said it, and who knows why really. I was like the least religious person in the world back then. I might of sort of believed in Jesus and God and all that, but if I did I would have to say I probably thought of them as being right up there with like Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny, which I hate to admit now, but I gotta be honest, like I said.
But for some reason though, I just came right out and said it. And it sort of came out like a prayer, which I wasn`t doing too much of back then either. Praying that is. But that`s how it came out.
God, " I said, like I was really talking to Him. God, I wish maybe someday you could make me into an angel " so I could just go around helping people all the time, " I told him. " just like all kinds of people, lots and lots " and help them in real important ways too " like an angel does. " And then I looked around real fast to make sure no one else had heard me. Really I was just sort of thinking out loud anyway. But I knew the mechanics would never let me hear the end of it if they had heard me say something like that. But there wasn`t anyone around. Or so I figured at the time. But knowing what I know now about the Holy Spirit and everything, I`m not so sure about that. I mean, probably the Holy Spirit was hanging around and heard me. And like I`m saying, that could just be when this all started. And for the purpose of this book, we`ll just agree on that. Because I gotta tell ya too, not long after that, the most important and totally supernatural thing that has happened so far in my life happened. And wait until you hear about that. Just wait "..