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World

Man Jailed for Beating Mom With a Light Saber!

A 42-year-old Pennsylvania man is facing an assault and harassment charges after allegedly beating his mother with a Star Wars light saber, according to court records.

Robert Paul ReyesMan Jailed for Beating Mom With a Light Saber! - A 42-year-old Pennsylvania man is facing an assault and harassment charges after allegedly beating his mother with a Star Wars light saber, according to court records.
Robert Paul ReyesTeen Student Shows Up For Senior Prom in a Casket! Video! - Alexandrea Clark arrived to her senior prom in a hearse on Saturday at Americus Sumter High School, and said there was a good message behind it.
Robert Paul ReyesWoman Says She Was Injured by Drag Queen's Breast, Sues Hamburger Mary's in Tampa - Methinks this is another frivolous lawsuit, the judge should dismiss her case and give her a voucher for a free meal at a hamburger joint like McDonalds where there will be zero chance that she would be assaulted by a drag queen.
Robert Paul ReyesTaco Bell Employee Assaults Manager With Burrito! - A Taco Bell employee is facing arrest after allegedly throwing a hot burrito at his manager because he was upset over having to work the morning shift, South Carolina police report.
Robert Paul ReyesSniffing Farts Can Stave Off Disease - Hydrogen sulfide, the gas that gives farts their rotten smell, can help stave off disease.
Robert Paul ReyesWhy is God Always Destroying Trailer Parks? - Fire officials in Arizona say a man who was attempting to burn spiders under his mobile home sparked a fire on Sunday night.
Robert Paul ReyesWatch Vest-Wearing Chickens Cross Road Safely - A bed and breakfast in Scotland fitted a group of chickens with high-visibility vests to help them cross a local road.
Robert Paul ReyesWoman Given Lifetime Bus Pass as 103rd birthday Gift - A frequent bus rider in Florida was given a lifetime bus pass in celebration of her 103rd birthday.
Robert Paul ReyesFarting Passenger Forces Passengers Off Airplane - I can deal with snakes on a plane, and even with jihadists on a plane, but nobody can deal with a farter on a plane.
Robert Paul ReyesPublic Restrooms In China Ration Toilet Paper! Commie Hellhole! - Officials in a Chinese city are saving money on toilet paper in public restrooms by employing facial recognition technology in the stalls.
Robert Paul ReyesMan Proposes to Girlfriend While Being Arrested: Video - Police body camera video captured Brandon Thompson being arrested for six felony warrants on his birthday.
Robert Paul ReyesGreat News! Robots Will be Flipping Burgers at CaliBurger Restaurants by 2018! - A burger-flipping robot called Flippy will be at work in CaliBurger restaurants by early 2018.
Robert Paul ReyesMexican Mayor Marries Magnificent Crocodile - The mayor of a Mexican town married a crocodile as part of a centuries-old tradition to bring an abundant harvest to the fishing town.
Robert Paul ReyesCocky Criminals Caught Trying to Carry Off Cops' Cocks - A couple of bird brains broke into barn housing chickens confiscated in a massive raid on upstate cockfighting ring this week and tried to bust the roosters out of the joint - only to find themselves behind bars.
Robert Paul ReyesMillennial Wankers Get Lost in the Woods Searching for UFO's - These millennial scum had smart phones, but no flashlights. To go hiking in the woods in the evening without flashlights is nuttier than believing in UFO's.
Robert Paul ReyesPic of Kim Jong-un's Face Featured on $80 Male Romper - The unique romper is on sale online for $79.99, what twisted wanker would buy such a perverted outfit?
Robert Paul ReyesFirefighters Rescue Woman With Leg Stuck in Toilet - Firefighters in China rescued a woman who was trapped in a bathroom when her leg became stuck in a toilet for six hours.
Robert Paul ReyesSwiss Adult Education School Teaching Klingon - Speaking of language courses, Donald Trump would be well-advised to enroll in an adult education remedial English class.
Robert Paul ReyesCanadian Dude Mows Lawn With Tornado Behind Him - Tornadoes in Canada?
Robert Paul ReyesMaintenance Guy Plays With Homeowner's Cat: Video - It restores my faith in human nature that this maintenance guy fixed the problem and played with the cat.
Robert Paul ReyesA Tale Involving a Naked Burglar, a Bucket, and a $25,000 Swan Sculpture - God have mercy on Floridians.
Robert Paul ReyesChinese Driver Uses Umbrella While Driving Convertible in Rain! Write Your Own Joke! - This story confirms my belief that life is absurd, if life was fair this clueless clown would be driving a Ford Pinto and not a beautiful machine like a Mercedes-Benz convertible.
Robert Paul ReyesDude Sues Date for Texting During 'Guardians of the Galaxy Vo. 2' - The lawsuit alleges the woman opened her phone to read and send text messages 10 to 20 times during the film.
Robert Paul ReyesOutrage! Green Party Teaching Women How to Urinate Standing Up! - Teaching women how to urinate standing up is a biological absurdity, and an affront to the Almighty! What in the name of God is next? Will they hold a special meeting to teach women how to adjust their crotch in public just like the dudes?
Robert Paul ReyesEvil Ronald McDonald Statue Stolen From McDonald's Restaurant - It doesn't get any more evil than a life-size statue of a clown sitting on a bench outside of a McDonald's restaurant, the civic-minded citizen who stole the abomination should be awarded a key to the city.
Robert Paul ReyesWoman Arrested For Xylophone Rage Attack - Although Encarnacion should be commended for her restraint, I would have boiled the pot of cooking grease before dumping it on the moron playing the musical instrument.
Robert Paul ReyesOutrage: Centenarian Awarded Gold Medal for Running 100-Meter Sprint in 1 Minute 40 Seconds - Enough with this politically-correct tomfoolery in pretending that folks who are older than dirt can still participate in athletic events.
Robert Paul ReyesEpic Encounter Between Red Panda and a Rock Rocks the Internet: Video - This epic encounter between the panda and the rock is a prime example why we love the Internet.
Robert Paul ReyesDad Kills Son Over Who Would Walk the Dog - A family argument over who would walk the dog turned deadly when a dad shot and killed his son during a wild shootout Sunday in Chicago.
Robert Paul ReyesTwitter User Seeks 18 Million Retweets for Free Wendy's Nuggets - Wendy's challenged a Twitter user to accumulate 18 million retweets on a single tweet to earn a year of free chicken nuggets.
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