Contact theSOPAbout theSOPSupport theSOPWritersEditorsManaging Editors
theSOP logo
Published:May 17th, 2010 09:39 EST
Is the Gulf of Mexico Oil Spill An Extinction Level Event?

Is the Gulf of Mexico Oil Spill An Extinction Level Event?

By R.J. Smith

It sounds like the plot of a cheesy B movie, one no decent person would ever be caught watching even in the privacy of their own home with the shades pulled and volume down really low.  A large corporation somehow messes with the environment and threatens to destroy the planet, mainstream media covers it all up, and one scientist, whom no one will listen to, figures the whole thing out just in time to save the day.  With help from a group of misfits of course. 

Except this time, the disaster is real. 

The characters are nearly set as well.  In the role of the catastrophe is the Gulf of Mexico oil leak.  BP and Haliburton are sharing the part of the evil corporation.  The Scientist would be Paul Noel, a Software Engineer for the U.S. Army at Redstone Arsenal in Alabama, who has made statements suggesting that he believes that the oil pocket hit will be impossible to contain.  The group of misfits... well, it could be anyone. 

There is even a secret document that has leaked to the Internet.  Yes folks, this story has it all. 

The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration`s Emergency Response document, which is exactly what it sounds like, is dated April 28th and claims the scope of the spill is far worse than the public is aware of.  Somewhere, Michael Bay is wondering why he didn`t think of this first. 

The words "Extinction Level Event" have been used in recent articles to describe what we are facing.  To scientists that means a whole lot.  To the rest of us it is just a bunch of pretty words.  Cue the part in the movie where the entire crazy disaster is broken down using a familiar metaphor that even the dumbest of the population can understand.

Imagine you`re having a party and buy a keg of beer.  Some joker decides to pour a quart of motor oil into the keg.  Now imagine that party is the people of the Earth and the keg of beer is our water supply.  The joker, of course, would be BP.  How long before the party is over?  

Extinction Level Event, folks.  On par with the meteor that took out the dinosaurs.  That is what some say we are facing at this very moment.  The end of life as we know it, a full two years before the whole crazy 2012 movement expected. 

And that, good readers of the Internet, is how the story of our grand civilization could end.  Instead of a nuclear war or rogue meteor, we could be smothered in the very thing that our greed led us to believe we couldn`t get enough of.  Or maybe this is all sensationalism.  A conspiracy of a few random journalists with absolutely nothing in common created to scare the masses. 

Time will tell, but as of now, it is not looking very good for the latter explanation. 

Any comments on this article can be sent to roguepirateninja@yahoo.com.

Sources:
Leaked Report:
http://blog.al.com/live/2010/04/deepwater_horizon_secret_memo.html
Other sources:
http://www.naturalnews.com/028749_Gulf_of_Mexico_oil_spill.html
http://coyoteprime-runningcauseicantfly.blogspot.com/2010/05/gulf-oil-spill-extinction-level-event.html
http://blog.al.com/live/2010/05/video_shows_federal_officials.html