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Published:August 4th, 2009 10:12 EST
Brian Boitano Brings Boldly Bacons Back BIG!

Brian Boitano Brings Boldly Bacons Back BIG!

By Rocco Loosbrock

It seems like everyone in the world of media is suddenly freaking out over the latest news release that The Food Network " has announced the signing of popular, two-time World Champion / four-time National Champion figure skater Brian Boitano to host and star in an upcoming new show.

What we here at find a lot more fascinating is specifically what he intends to start his gourmet food " television career by serving up to the watching world.

His very first episode is already planned out and it includes Brian hosting a little dinner party for an All Female " Roller Derby team. And exactly what does this multi-time World & National Champion athlete intend to serve this bevy of beauties on wheels?

Believe it or not, the very first show will have Brian serving up a menu that includes both; Bacon Corn Muffins spread generously with a savory cream cheese frosting & Bacon Cups!

The name of the show proves that both The Food Network and Mr. Boitano have a great sense of humor. The show will be called: What Would Brian Boitano Make! " This is a clever little parody of an infamous episode of the comedically crass and crude television program South Park, where there was an episode and an entire musical number entitled: What Would Brian Boitano Do! "

By the way, the infamous South Park episode itself was an irreverent parody of the popular Christian slogan: What would Jesus Do!

The show will premiere on August 23, 2009 at 1 pm on the Food Network. Boitano, now at the age of 45, lives in San Francisco, California where he has proven over the years to be an immaculate chef.

Mr. Boitano will bring many of his personal grace, poise, charm and life experiences into the context of the program, as well as his elaborate and good willed sense of humor.

Personally I think it`s awesome that a guy who is consistently in such perfect shape as to win gold Medals in Olympic athletic events loves to eat bacon so much! That sort of pig-headed Suey Enthuey-siasm " touches the very center of this Bacon Freak`s soul!

By the way, Brian`s obsession for all things bacon will not be satisfactorily satiated by the pilot episode of his Food Network program. Apparently coming in an episode soon near you, Brian makes Bourbon Bacon Apple Tarts! Mmmmmm, I can already taste it!

Signing off at Pigging out!
Rocco "Boss Hog" Loosbrock 


(SOP readers use coupon code SOP to get 10% off your next Bacon order) 


Rocco owns and runs a Bacon of the Month Club called The Bacon Freak Bacon is Meat Candy Bacon Club as well as a Wine Club called the Coastal Vineyard Wine Club


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