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Published:March 20th, 2010 13:21 EST
tiger woods

Would You Buy A Tiger Woods Sex Toy?

By Robert Paul Reyes

 

"Just when things could not get any worse for golf`s biggest star, Tiger Woods sex toys have flooded the market since the world`s highest paid athlete got embroiled in a sex scandal with an intricate web of women.

tiger woodsWoods` lawyers are seeking legal action from one company manufacturing and selling Tiger Woods-themed sex toys." TheExaminer.Com/Marv Dumon

Tiger Woods` lawyers should stop harassing companies manufacturing and selling Tiger Woods-inspired sex toys. Tiger Woods has become synonymous with sexual hijinks, and it`s only natural that the disgraced golfer`s name be linked with sex toys.

In fact, Woods` attorneys should try to get their client endorsement deals with sex-related companies. Tiger has lost all credibility as a spokesman for reputable companies, but who wouldn`t buy the playboy golfer as a pitchman for a porn movie company?

Wood`s legion of advisers, handlers, sycophants, lawyers, and marketing gurus did zilch to stop the promiscuous golfer from bedding party girls, porn stars and cocktail waitresses in the last ten years, and now they are trying to stop a company from selling Tiger Woods sex toys? Many words come to mind: Irony, stupidity, lameness.

Tiger Woods is making his comeback at the Masters Tournament, the most tightly controlled tournament in the PGA. Stalin would envy how the Masters bigwigs control every aspect of their event. It will be almost impossible for fans to launch any kind of protest at this prestigious tournament -- Tiger will be spared having fans jeer him.

But at every other stop on the PGA schedule, fans should express their disgust at the cowardly, hypocritical and deceitful golfer. Fans should wear pimp hats, wave sex toys at the golfer and shout out words of "encouragement." Fans have a constitutional right to express their disgust, anything short of violence, or threats of violence, should be permissible.

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes