January 19th, 2010 19:27 EST
Is marriage just a golden meal ticket for men?
Talk about conflicting messages. If you were to believe what you saw on television, the movies, magazines or listen to most popular love songs, you would think that finding a man and settling down was in the best interest of all women. Why? Because your life would be complete, you would be secure with a house, kids, money and of course, never ending love and devotion. But, so many recent studies show none of this true at all. In fact, they show women can and often do as well materially and emotionally on their own. So, one has to ask " is there any reason left for women to get married.
According to the January 19th study entitled, " New Economics of Marriage: The Rise of Wives " by the Pew Research Center, men benefit the most economically in a marriage. Add to that, the jobs " women perform around the house such as cooking, cleaning, and rearing the children and it would seem that men are the victors in relationships. But, if this is the case then why did the study also find that marriage levels have declined since the 1970`s while the education and financial achievements of women have skyrocketed?
Perhaps, it`s because men are still adjusting to the notion that 22 percent of women in 2007 earned more than their husbands, while only 4 percent did in 1970. Not being the top earning in a household may be threatening to a man or it could be that being career oriented is limited the most women from having the time to find a man.
It could also be that In addition to finding women challenging their bank accounts, men are discovering they are being matched and surpassed in intellectual achievement too. According to the same Pew Research study, in 2007, 53.5% of college graduates were women and 46.5% were men while in 1970, 64% degree earners were men and 36% were women.
I spoke with dozens of women as research for my book I Didn`t Work This Hard Just to Get Married: Successful, Single Black Women Speak Out and what I found was that women could care less who earns more or has more degrees in a relationship. Ultimately, most just want a partner who respects their achievements, can support them and not distract from them. If they can`t find a partner fitting this bill, financial independence is allowing these people carve out happy, full, single lives.
I Didn`t Work This Hard Just to Get Married
To read an excerpt: www.mcbeamon.com
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