June 19th, 2010 10:54 EST
World Cup Fan Ruptures Throat Blowing Vuvuzela: Thank God!
"Insurance saleswoman Yvonne Mayer, 29, was unable to speak or eat for two days after ripping her windpipe when she blew the three foot horn during a street party in Cape Town.
The next day shocked doctors diagnosed her with a ruptured throat and ordered her to rest it completely to allow it to heal.
The bizarre injury is the first known vuvuzela-related accident since the World Cup kicked off last week."
Yvonne Mayer is a very attractive woman, and normally I`m heartbroken if a hottie so much as stubs her toe. But I don`t have the slightest bit of sympathy for Yvonne, you pick up Satan`s instrument at your own peril.
The vuvuzelas are ubiquitous at the World Cup , and the infernal noise makes the games unbearable to watch. I`d rather hear Roseanne Barr sing the national anthem or make love to a midget than be subjected to the hellish sounds of a thousand vuvuzelas.
If there`s a god in heaven hundreds of soccer fans will suffer a similar injury while blowing a vuvuzela.
Soccer has failed to take off in the United States, and now that Americans have witnessed the diabolical scene of thousands of idiots blowing vuvuzelas at the World Cup, i`ts certain that futbol will never gain a foothold in our country.