June 20th, 2010 11:48 EST
Vuvuzelas: The Biggest Story Of The World Cup
The biggest story of the World Cup is the vuvuzela, fans by the thousands blow the plastic horns making watching a match an unbearable experience for anyone who isn`t a soccer fanatic.
A diabolically clever mind made sure that everyone could get their hands on a vuvuzela
VUVUZELAS ARE CHEAP
A sap who can only afford to dine on Top Ramen can afford one of these plastic horns.
VUVUZELAS ARE EASY TO USE
Even a small child can operate one. Wait until those horrible kids who live next door get a hold of some vuvuzelas.
VUVUZELAS ARE AVAILABLE EVERYWHERE
In soccer mad countries they are sold by street vendors, department stores, convenience stores, gas stations...
VUVUZELAS ARE LONG DANGEROUS INSTRUMENTS
If an idiot doesn`t blow your eardrums blowing on a vuvuzela, he might poke you in the eye.
VUVUZELAS ARE GAUDY
It`s appropriate that these toys come in loud garish colors
VUVUZELAS ARE ADDICTIVE
It`s addictive to play them, and it`s addictive to complain about them.
VUVUZELA CRAZE HAS JUST STARTED
It`s going to get worse, before it gets better.
See what I mean about the devil being behind this fad?
Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes