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Published:September 30th, 2010 14:45 EST
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Top Five Weekly Music Picks

By Inactive Writer

In this modern day and age - an age where everyone and their brother, half brother, fourth cousin twice removed and grandparents have access to the Internet and their own respective blogs, it seems as if everyone has their own documented opinion on music. Therefore, the question you may have is "Why are there so many lists for the top music picks, and why do the writers all think they`re authorities on the subject?"

I can`t answer that for you - but I can offer you my own list of the top five music picks for this week!

I can also tell you that I am not unbiased and I`m not afraid to tell you that your favorite band or artist sucks. I`m not going to BS you, and if you disagree with me, you`re probably wrong. Period.

Now that we`re in unanimous agreement, allow me to offer you my top five music picks of this week:

5. Ice Cube, Jagged Edge, Jeezy, Lil Boosie and Kenny Chesney have new albums.

Why am I putting them all into one number? Look below.

Grade: F

Equal parts of failure, that`s why!

4. Bad Religion - The Dissent of Man

The venerable California punk band, now in their 30th year, is still going strong with their 15th studio album. In true Bad Religion and our-lead-singer-is-a-college-professor form, the lyrics are insightful, intellectual, and far better than any of the carbon-copy, puerile lyrics that seem to interminably pollute the airwaves these days. Vocal harmonies and punk beats punctuate these profound lyrics, but the band also tinkers with some folk-rock melodies. Punk fans, rejoice!

Grade: A-

3. Jimmy Eat World - Invented

The Arizona emo band has done it again.

Before I continue, let me clarify that modern-day emo has become a joke. Somehow, somewhere, emo bands today thought it would be unique and clever to dress like girls, complete with eyeliner and a wrist cutting, eternally depressed fanbase. That is not REAL emo music. If you want real emo, look no further than bands such as Jets to Brazil, Christie Front Drive, Mineral, The Get Up Kids and the aforementioned Jimmy Eat World.

Moving on -  Jimmy Eat World`s new album takes on much of the same approach of their previous endeavors - a nice balance of alternative-rock and emotional roller coasters. I know, some will say emo and alt. rock are essentially one in the same - eat me. One thing I was really glad to hear was Tom Linton , the band`s original lead vocalist, providing vocals for "Action Needs an Audience." This album grips you, kicks you in the teeth, then lets go and pours you a soothing cup of tea.

Grade: A

2. Gin Blossoms - No Chocolate Cake

Let`s face it - with a few glaring exceptions, modern rock sucks. Bands like Nickelback and Kid Rock really make me wonder if people have lost their musical minds. Mainstream modern rock used to have a name - grunge - and it kicked enormous amounts of ass. Those were the days when bands like Gin Blossoms reigned supreme. Nowadays, it seems as if every band is trying to outdo each other with ineptitude. Lyrics about getting drunk, laid, high and in trouble mixed with snooze-worthy instrumentals.

One of those glaring exceptions is, of course, Gin Blossoms with their new album. After disappearing from the music scene in 1997, I was left with "New Miserable Experience" and "Congratulations, I`m Sorry" to remember the band`s name. They emerged from the shadows in 2006 with the unimpressive "Major Lodge Victory," and I was left wondering if the band could ever regain form.

They have. I don`t say that because I love the new album, I say that because any band that can be mainstream and noteworthy without having to fit the mold of today`s modern rock is fine by me. Just listen to the damn album.

Grade: A-

I should add that this list is in no particular order.

1. I almost forgot that Gucci Mane has a new album!

Grade: Kindergarten Drop-Out "F"

Until next time!

Note: The author of this article is no longer affiliated with theSOP.