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Published:May 22nd, 2011 01:05 EST

Johnny Depp Goes Wild With Fart Machine On Set Of Pirates Of The Caribbean 4

By Robert Paul Reyes

"Having worked with (Johnny) Depp before, Cruz must have been aware that Depp has the fun tendency to play pranks on people, including having them `pass gas` when they sit down. Cruz told USA Today, `He has a fart machine with a remote control. He puts it in your chair and then he goes ten meters away with the remote, presses the button so anyone who is sitting next to you is going to think it`s you.`"

deppJohnny`s fart machine wouldn`t work on a real man; a guy confident in his own masculinity wouldn`t give a rip if he people thought he cut the cheese. In fact if someone used the fart machine to make people think I was farting, I would lift my butt to make it more realistic.

Depp isn`t being childish by playing such a prank, and real men aren`t being boorish when they let it rip in public. A wimp will hold it in until he`s blue in the face, but a macho man will lift his leg to give his fart more power.

I`m convinced women look adoringly at their men when they break wind with impunity in public. I admit I am a bit confused, why do women give me a wide berth?



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