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Published:February 29th, 2012 12:53 EST

Is Pop Tart Snooki Pregnant?

By Robert Paul Reyes

"Snooki may just have a tiny tot in the oven.

According to reports, the pint-sized reality star is expecting her first child with boyfriend Jionni LaValle."


Snooki may be pregnant, what does this mean for Western Civilization?


From a theological perspective it`s good news, it means that it will be at least two decades before Snooki`s spawn, the Antichrist, wreaks havoc on Earth.

From the viewpoint of Snooki`s brand, it`s the worst news possible. Snooki swears like a sailor on shore leave, mates like a rabbit in heat, and drinks like a fish. Are we ready for Snooki the new mom and homemaker? It`s a rhetorical question, folks!

If Snooki is pregnant it would be the height or irresponsibility if the producers of "Jersey Shore" allow her to continue whoring around and and drinking like an alcoholic on skid row.

If Snooki is pregnant she should be written of her reality show.

Get thee to a nunnery!

Photo Credit: Wikipedia.Org

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